


body electric

by freddiesjim



Category: Queen (Band)
Genre: Adultery, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Deacury, Drinking, Flashbacks, Government, Lowercase Format, M/M, Maylor - Freeform, Mild Angst, Mild Smut, Romance, Slow Burn, Soulmate AU, gay clubs, most of it isnt proof read lmao oopsie daisies, soft deacury
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-28
Updated: 2019-08-17
Packaged: 2020-07-23 20:40:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 25,287
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20014480
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/freddiesjim/pseuds/freddiesjim
Summary: soulmate (noun)a soulmate is someone that just gets you. it’s a connection of minds, a mutual respect, an unconditional love and a total understanding. it’s about being yourself and knowing, not only that person is following and understanding your thoughts, but is right there with you, side by side.





	1. chapter one

matching day (noun) 

the day of the year when all individuals turned 21 shall be matched with their soulmate by a system used by the british government

those who do not form a relationship with their matched soulmate shall be IMPRISONED FOREVER 

those who commit adultery shall be PROSECUTED AND/OR KILLED 

♛

one week to go

john deacon was amongst the abundance of people who were absolutely thrilled at the thought of matching day. instead of waiting on and looking for your soulmate for years on end, your soulmate was chosen for you. there was no effort required. all you had to do was be a young person aged around 21 and john happened to be one of those young persons.

this year was the year; the year that he'd meet the soon-to-be love of his life. the person who he'd spend every waking moment with. the person who he'd wake up with every morning and the person who he would be able to kiss sweetly on those mornings. the person who he would hopefully marry. the person who he'd call his husband.

with only one week to go, john was understandably hyper. he found himself rushing around everywhere; he had recently bought a whole new set of shampoos, conditioners and body washes. he needed to look perfect the day he met his soulmate, the love of his life. he scrubbed his teeth five times a day instead of the usual twice a day, leaving his mouth burning after every brush but his teeth sparkling white and his breath incredibly minty and fresh.

for the past two weeks, john had been watching countless movies focused on soulmates and romcoms. matching day was known around the globe; although it only occured in britain, the rest of the world seemed to admire the idea. america, hollywood that is, had made tons and tons of movies to do with matching day, and it was those movies that john found himself watching every night, cuddled up with snacks and a fluffy blanket. he was obsessed with the concept of love and he was a true romantic.

john's mother, lilian deacon, also knew how excited her son was for the big day. she knew john was gay, and so the fact that he would be matched with a male didn't bother her at all. she'd love her son no matter what, and she also told herself that she'd also love her son in law all the same. treat him like her own. john's father, arthur, also made the same promises. they were a very accepting couple and john couldn't have been luckier to have such amazing parents.

lilian also knew about john's little liking towards his best friend, freddie, who happened to be the lead singer of the highly successful band john was also in, Queen. she remembers john sobbing in her arms one night many months ago due to the fact he had seen freddie kissing another boy outside of a gay club in the middle of the day. but, as time went by, john's little crush had near enough evaporated. but, lilian had a sneaking feeling that john was secretly hoping to be matched with freddie. john, however, would be over the moon with whomever he was destined to spend the rest of his life with.

there was only one thing that was concerning john about matching day; his looks. what if his soulmate didn't like his hair? or his nose? or his...ass? he didn't consider himself a highly attractive man. sure, he had had multiple girls come up to him in the past (which he didn't enjoy at all), but he figured that was just because of his status; he was the bass player in one of the most well known bands in the world. of course girls were going to try and get in his pants with the lingering thought in their heads that said i just fucked one of the members of the biggest band in the world. john, however, wanted to stay absolutely pure for his soulmate.

he had nothing against people who had sex with other people before matching day, it was their bodies, they could do whatever they pleased with them, he wasn't bothered. but to him, sex was precious and he only wanted to experience that with his destined soulmate. it wasn't like john had never had kinky thoughts about other men he had come across in the past, but he stayed faithful to himself and his soulmate, even though he had never even met him yet.

the thought about being chosen to spend the rest of your life with a complete stranger set john on edge a little, but he came to the conclusion that it was meant to be; there was nothing to be afraid of. when you met your soulmate, it felt like you had known them for years.

some people in the past had been matched with people they know. some were even matched with their best friends. if john knew he was going to be paired with someone he had known for most of his life, his anxiety would shoot right down. it was a much more relaxing thought. he'd perhaps even prefer it that way.

the young bassist was currently laying down on the sofa in the little flat that he shared with his best friends and bandmates, roger, brian and freddie. he was again enveloped in a fluffy blanket and surrounded by delicious snacks, his eyes glued to the television screen (which was displaying yet another romance film). he was so into the film that he didn't hear three rowdy people storm into the apartment.

"johnnyyyy," cried an excited roger. roger was the drummer of the band. quite small yet incredibly mighty. he had golden locks and the brightest blue eyes. he was considered the prettiest member of the band. a couple years ago, queen did an interview with a popular magazine and they classed roger as 'the one who looks the most feminine' (even despite freddie's particularly feminine choice of clothing). roger was the babe magnet, the one who'd take home the most girls. after every clubbing session the four of them had, roger almost always went home with a pretty woman. freddie was the same but with men.

john sat up from his lazy position and paused the movie. he had seen it twice before in the last week so he wasn't particularly bothered by the intrusion.

roger, brian and freddie had went to biba, the funky fashion store in the middle of the city, to look for possible outfits for their next gig, which happened to be the day before they were all going to be matched. all four of them were going to be paired with their soulmate on the same day (with them being around the same ages), and so they had planned to walk to the matching centre, a large hall on the other side of town where every person who would be getting matched would meet and gather in order to be told the names of their soulmates.

"in here." john called back, shifting his legs from the sofa, making the seat available for two more people. he folded the blanket back up and placed it on the back of the chair and smiled as the other three walked into the living room.

brian exchanged a smile and a nod with the bassist. brian was relatively quiet but he could be quite loud and strong spoken when he wanted to be. he had a lot of hair, which was tightly curled, big and full. he looked almost like a poodle according to roger. brian took the other seat across the room, it being his favourite.

following brian came roger, bouncing in full of energy. he walked over to the coffee table and stole a digestive biscuit from the packet which john had been snacking from moments before. he looked at the television and rolled his eyes.  
"romance films, again? you're such a fucking sap," he commented, and john just stuck up his middle finger and giggled.

after roger came freddie, who waltzed in like a majestical creature. freddie was dressed in a brightly coloured hawaiian looking shirt which was decorated with pink flowers and green leaves. it was unbuttoned to just under the top of his torso, displaying his incredibly hairy chest, and a long necklace was hanging down from his neck. the outfit was complimented by black leather trousers which john couldn't imagine ever pulling off himself. freddie had a rather strange taste in fashion but everything he wore, he pulled off effortlessly. john admired it a great deal.

freddie was very exotic looking, with raven coloured hair and a thin, pointy nose. he had gentle, dark bambi brown eyes and very soft looking lips. he also had quite a large overbite which he despised, but john found it rather adorable.

freddie was also gay, like john himself, so john found him the easiest to talk to and confide in. even though they were a group of best friends, there were little sub-groups. brian and roger seemed to be closest, with roger being the wild, ecstatic and crazy one and brian being the reserved one who calmed roger down. they complimented eachother quite nicely.

freddie and john were also the closest, both being gay and freddie being the eldest of the four and john being the youngest; freddie was like a big brother. he was ever so protective of john and john was protective of him in return. passers by might say that they seemed to be a bit too close to be just best friends, but john and freddie both knew that that was impossible; they were just friends (even if john had had a tiny little petite small crush on the older boy in the past, but that phase had passed long ago)

"hello darling!" freddie announced, sitting down next to john, roger joining them not even a second later. "what were you watching?"

john hesitated for a moment, looking to the side to gaze at the cd disk, having forgotten the name of the film despite watching it multiple times.

"pretty woman." he smiled, and the blonde drummer gasped loudly, silencing the other three. john and freddie turned to face him with raised eyebrows, as did brian, and roger's cheeks flushed red within a matter of seconds. he then scowled, looking down at the floor, tongue in cheek.

"what? i like that film," he muttered quietly, defending his reaction. the other three burst out in laughter, freddie taking to rubbing his back in a mocking way.

"oh darling, don't fret. we all know you love a good romcom," freddie cooed, whilst still giggling. roger shifted to get freddie's hand off of his back and he left the couch, sitting on the arm of brian's chair. john tilted his head back in laughter and crossed his legs on the couch, accidentally kneeing freddie's thigh. he apologised but freddie just raised his hand in reply, silently telling him it was fine.

"y'no what? fuck you all. you're all tasteless if you don't love a good romcom!" the drummer crossed his arms, still scowling and looking to the ground.

"i'm laughing because you took the piss out of me for watching a romance movie and then continue to claim your absolute love for romcoms? i call hypocrisy," john chimed in, crossing his arms just like the drummer had. he went to take another digestive off of the table, stuffing it in his mouth as roger yet again rolled his eyes.

there was a moment of silence between the four before roger piped up again.

"why were you watching a romance film in the first place? come to think of it, that's all you've been bloody watching these past two weeks."

this time, john heard brian and freddie groan, the singer flopping back on the chair and sinking down whilst closing his eyes. brian just tilted his head back a little and john was confused at their own little outbursts.

"matching day is next week," he answered, looking hopeful. freddie sat forward and grabbed another biscuit and chewing on it to get out of having to contribute to the conversation. roger suddenly sat up straight and his face displayed a look of horror. he jumped up and ran to the kitchen calendar. john, freddie and brian sat patiently in the living room awaiting the drummer's return. about twenty seconds later, he did finally return, but in a massive rush.

"shit! i forgot all about it!" he screamed and continued to collapse on the floor with dramatic effect, placing his face on the purple carpet. freddie nearly pissed himself with laughter, clutching his stomach as he doubled over. he tried to say 'you dumb blonde!' but his speech was unclear due to his laughter. brian then joined in with the mocking of the drummer whilst john just placed his face in his hands.

"how the hell can you forget? it's all the world have been banging on about these past few weeks. don't you watch the news?" brian chuckled, earning a startled look from the singer and bassist and a raised eyebrow from the dummer. "of course i don't." roger stated, then returning his face to the floor.

"stupid question, bri," freddie chuckled. brian just raised his pointer and middle finger at the singer.

reminding himself of freddie's and brian's reaction to the hint at matching day, he decided to question them on it. weren't they excited?

"hey, freddie, bri, aren't you excited? for next week?" john quizzed, tilting his head to the side whilst awaiting their responses. brian sat forward and manspreaded, leaning his elbows on each of his thighs and cupping the sides of his face in his hands. freddie reached forward and grasped john's cold cup of tea, took a sip and grimaced at the liquid, politely settling it down again, checking if anybody had seen him. john inwardly giggled at his friends disgusted reaction.

"i personally am not excited but each to their own i guess," the guitarist shrugged and freddie nodded along. "i just find it despicable that the government seem to think that they have the right to choose the person we are going to spend the rest of our lives with and then punish us terribly if the relationships naturally just don't work out." he concluded, and john could surprisingly see his point. he even agreed to a certain extent, but for the whole of his life he had convinced himself that matching day was a beautiful thing and nothing could possibly go wrong.

he didn't understand those who cheated on their soulmates. the person who was made for them was right there and yet they sodded off to somebody else, causing immense heartache and devastation. he wouldn't ever find himself cheating. it was a despicable and selfish act. but, then again, he was a young man. he had never found himself in a loveless relationship; he had never really found himself in a relationship strong enough to even consider love. the only time he had ever felt remotely close to the strong pulls and electricity that love provided was during the time he was hopelessly devoted to freddie, but ever since that passed, he hadn't felt it ever since. and being completely honest, he didn't really want to; he was saving his love for his soulmate.

after a couple hours of just lounging around the house, brian proposed the idea of popping to the studio to work on a couple things. the band had just announced that a new album should be expected quite soon, and they had finished a handful of good songs which would end up on the album, but freddie had had writers block for nearly two weeks and so they weren't really getting anywhere at the current moment.

"yes, we should. hopefully the studio environment would help clear up this shitting writers block. its ever so irritating, i tell you-" freddie explained. and so, the four of them geared up and made their way to the studio across town which they had recorded some of their finest records. keep yourself alive, seven seas of rhye, in the lap of the gods... revisited, killer queen, somebody to love and it's a hard life had been recorded in the studio, and so the band claimed it as the space where they would always record, having made some hefty £££'s due to their work there.

as the four of them rolled up and got into their respective positions to start making some tunes, freddie stood still, his hand on the bottom half of the mic. he seemed to be staring into space, and even though concerns rose from the rest of the band, they decided to leave him be, seeing if he was in a trance of imagination, thinking up his next song. they all crossed their fingers, hoping that his writer's block had passed until he broke from the silence and sighed loudly, slamming his foot on the ground.

"oh for fucks sake! i can't think of anything! not one single thing! usually i have all sorts of weird fucking words in my brain that i can work with to make a song, but i don't even have that!" he near-enough screamed, setting the microphone on its stand before sulking off to the piano. "i'm fucking useless, i tell you!"

freddie fell back onto the piano stool and placed his head on the keys, putting his arms behind his head and grasping his raven hair tightly. the piano made a rather unpleasant sound as freddie's head hit the keys. john, roger and brian had no idea how to help their best friend, and so they just stood their awkwardly, not moving a muscle.

a couple of minutes passed until john thought the whole situation was too dramatic. freddie still had his head pressed against the poor grand piano, and he decided to take a seat next to the older boy on the stool. brian and roger exchanged nervous glances and a shrug before returning their attention to the two boys on the piano stool. john put his arm around freddie's back and felt his slow breathing.

"hey, look freddie, it's oka-" he started, before freddie rudely interrupted him.

"no, deaks, it's not okay. how the hell are we supposed to put out an album if i can't even write a fucking song? it's not that hard! i don't know what's happened!" he cried, not lifting his head from the instrument. john just sighed quietly to himself before focusing his attention of the room next to the studio. he stood up, clasping freddie's shaking hand before forcing him to stand up.

"c'mon. we'll chat in the room next door." he ordered, and freddie obliged, standing up and following the young bassist out of the room, not daring to look at brian and roger.

john and freddie reached the significantly quieter room and took a seat. a moment of silence passed before john spoke up.

"do you have any idea of what caused this darn writer's block?" he asked, gently. freddie just shook his head.

"okay...when was the last time you wrote a full song?"

freddie shrugged. john got irritated.

"look, freddie, you're going to need to communicate with me."

"i don't know, john! i just woke up and my head was empty! there's nothing bloody in there!" freddie tried to chuckle to lighten the mood, but then he frowned straight after. john didn't say anything after that, he just gazed at the stressed boy in front of him, wishing he could help in anyway he could.

and then he remembered; he could help.

john stood up and walked over to a cupboard situated in the left corner of the room. he retrieved some paper and he grabbed a pen from his trouser pocket. freddie looked on in confusion and john sat infront of him, slamming the paper down on the table in front of them, holding the black biro in his right hand.

"we're going to write a song. together." john stated, not even as a question. as a demand. freddie just nodded his head, smiling warmly at the boy who was trying ever so hard to help him.

"right. give me a word." the bassist said, looking up at the raven-haired boy with glinting eyes. "any word. a name, a thing, an animal. anything."

freddie's eyes lit up as john said the word 'animal'. "cat." he blurted with excitement. john chuckled and nodded his head, writing down the word on top of the piece of paper.

"now give me an adjective that starts with the same letter. it's all about alliteration." the bassist joked, again looking up at freddie. he saw as the singer was deep in thought. silence overtook the room again before freddie spoke up.

"cool." he smiled. john nodded once again. "and there we go; cool cat by freddie mercury and john deacon." he giggled, doodling some little cats and stars on the no-longer blank piece of lined paper.

freddie loved the name of the song. it sounded groovy even though they hadn't even started on the lyrics yet. he imagined a slow, funky beat accompanied by high notes sung by himself.

the two men sat in thought, thinking up words and phrases that would compliment the title of the song nicely. and then suddenly freddie jumped in his seat and squealed, making john nearly have a heart attack. "i've got it! johnny i've got it!" he continued to squeal, and john just sat back and watched the older man dance with elation.

"come on then, what is it? tell me and i'll write it down," john got his black biro at the ready, willing to write down whatever freddie had come up with this time.

"''cause you're a cool cat, tapping on the toe with a new hat, ooh just cruising, driving along like the swing king, feeling the beat of my heart'. perhaps as the bridge? maybe? if you don't like it darling you don't have to-" as soon as freddie started to overthink it all and worry, john silenced him with a stern shake of the head and a blinding grin.

"don't be silly freddie. i love it. it's perfect."

"this is going to be a right funky song, isn't it darling?"

"most definitely."

♛

"let's go out. to celebrate." roger proposed once the foursome were leaving the studio. it was nearing 10pm and the boys had been at the studio since 12pm. john and freddie had finished writing their song, 'cool cat', and they had even started working on it, figuring out the beat and the rhythm, which turned out to be relatively calm and slow but with an extra twang of funk and disco. they decided to work it out with including vocals another time as they called it a day and walked out of the studio, receiving compliments by people who had overheard their little jamming session. freddie felt on top of the world having come over his short lived writers block. he was back on track, his mind full of interesting words and absurd phrases which he couldn't wait to include in future records.

"i second that," freddie agreed, walking behind brian and roger alongside john. they all headed towards the nearest gay club. although brian and roger near enough despised the music in gay clubs, it was the only place where their other two bandmates could truly be themselves, and so they compromised and agreed to go to a gay club tonight and a 'normal' club next time. roger hated it when freddie called them 'normal' clubs, like gay clubs or being gay in general isn't normal. he knew freddie struggled with internalised homophobia and he was willing to help his best friend whenever he needed it. he wasn't sure about john's feelings, but he assumed he didn't feel a whole different to freddie, and the same went for the young bassist. if he ever needed roger's help, roger would be by his side in an instant.

walking into the rowdy club, the guitarist and drummer instantly cringed at the music that was being blasted. it was a disco number, they gathered that much, but they decided to keep their opinions to themselves as they could see freddie tapping his fingers across his thigh to the beat and john nodding his head from side to side, obviously enjoying the track.

freddie led them to a table a couple of meters away from the bar and quite close to the dance floor. the club was full of horny, sweaty men grinding their groins up against eachother. brian turned his head to see two men literally shagging in the corner of the room. they obviously thought nobody would be able to see them but boy were they wrong. brian grimaced at the sight and sat down with his friends at the table. roger took their orders and went up to the bar to order a variety of drinks.

"cheers, rog," said john as the blonde settled in his seat, handing out their individual drinks. freddie had ordered a champagne to look somewhat sophisticated, john and roger got a beer and brian got a cider, having hate the taste of beer, thinking it too bitter.

although roger's opinion on the music was negative, he did fancy a quick dance. normally he would find himself grinding on a pretty girl in other clubs, but this time he had no choice but to join the horny, sweaty men on the vibrating dance floor. out of the corner of his eye, brian could see roger gazing at the dance floor, looking somewhat hesitant. maybe because he wasn't used to dancing amongst so many men he didn't know. in 'normal' clubs, the majority of people on the dance floor would be women, so maybe roger felt quite intimidated by all the men? either way, brian smiled at his best friend and stood up, offering him his hand. the guitarist gave him a look as if to say don't-ask-questions-just-dance. roger nodded and stood up, walking towards the centre of the room with his best friend.

and that left john and freddie sat at the table all alone, freddie swirling his champagne every few minutes, taking a sip and placing it back on the table, his eyes darting across the room. john could sense his boredom, and john was relatively bored himself. the bassist allowed his eyes to linger over freddie's attire one again. the hawaiian shirt he was wearing had one more button undone as opposed to earlier, and the top button of his leather trousers was also unbuttoned, having complained earlier that he was 'claustrophobic because the button felt too restricting'.

john smiled to himself remembering the earlier events in the studio. he was so so happy that he managed to help freddie out of his writers block. they had written a good song together. a song which they were both proud of, and they hoped that their fans would enjoy it too. after every line freddie came up with he squealed with delight and ordered john to write it down immediately before he forgot it. john just scribbled down any words or phrases they came up with, leaving them with a sheet full of ideas and crazy sentences and most of all, little drawings of cats with sunglasses on and petite flowers (freddie had insisted on only drawing freesias and azaleas as they were his favourite.)

"want to dance, darling?" freddie's wondering voice brought him out of his thoughts, and he hadn't realised he had been daydreaming whilst looking at the dance floor. he could see brian and roger dancing, not being hard to spot brian with his massive hair. he could see roger leaning in to brian and brian pushing his little blonde friend away ever so softly. not out of nastiness, but because of the fact that roger was a little tipsy and brian was a massive worry wart, probably not wanting to 'take advantage' of his friend, even if they were just dancing together (rather intimately, john might add).

john turned to look at the singer, the older boy smirking at him playfully whilst taking another generous sip of his champagne. the bassist just responded with an eager nod, standing up and following freddie to the middle of the dancefloor.

they were immediately crushed by sticky bodies and freddie was forced to take the younger mans hand, out of fear that he might be swallowed up by the abundance of men shaking their hips and grinding their cocks. john reminded himself to thank freddie for his help later.

when they reached the middle, freddie kept john close, looking him straight in the eyes when he started to bounce up and down to the beat. john did the same, wrapping his arms around freddie's neck in fear that he might be dragged away from him any second. freddie just chuckled and started to shake his hips along with john's, being careful not to make any unwanted touches with certain body parts.

freddie had always found john attractive. the bassist had extremely soft, light brown hair that cascaded down his neck, touching his shoulders. he had light features and a cute little mole just above the apple of his left cheek. freddie remembered when he had a tiny little crush on the younger boy and he remembered how badly he wanted to place small kisses around his face, especially on the little mark on his cheek. as freddie wrapped his hands around the boy tighter, he recalled the time when he would lay awake at nights wishing he could walk into the bassists bedroom and climb into his bed and just cuddle. sometimes he found himself wishing that he could walk into the bassists bedroom and climb into his bed and do some other things, but that was just a little phase. he was totally over john now.

he knew how excited john was for matching day. if freddie was being completely honest, he was absolutely shitting himself. freddie was scared of commitment, of spending your life with just one person. he normally found himself going to gay clubs and going home with whichever man decided to rub his cock up and down freddie's leg, and now that matching day was upon him, he knew that he'd have to give up that lifestyle. but, he kept telling himself that he would be more than happy with his chosen soulmate.

as the beat of the music sped up, so did john and freddie. freddie had to keep reminding himself that john was just a friend, because he was so tempted to grind up against him, whisper sweet nothings into his ear and hopefully take him home for a good time. but freddie held himself back, the closest touch being freddie sliding his leg just slightly inbetween johns for stability and just contact of some form.

the singer reminisced the time when he had collapsed in his sister's arms, sobbing uncontrollably after he had overheard john talking sweetly about a mystery man who he had had feelings for to roger. he couldn't bear standing and listening to the conversation for more than five seconds, but he had heard john explain how scared he was to tell this bloke how he felt for him and the fact that he was slowly falling in love with him. in order to make himself feel a little better, freddie had met up with a nice man he had met once in a club and they made out, in broad daylight, which was new to freddie. ever since that day, however, john hadn't mentioned anything or anyone, so freddie had assumed that the man had turned him down, and freddie wanted to rip this person apart for rejecting the bassist.

before he could stop it, john's head was being leant on freddie's shoulder and the singer could feel his hot breath through his shirt and on his skin. he was mentally screaming at himself to not let himself get too carried away.

there had been stories in the past of people being matched with people they know, such as long lost friends or even best friends. freddie knew it would be easier that way because however confident and outgoing he might be on the outside, on the inside he was an incredibly shy person. yes, he danced with strangers almost every night, but he had never considered more than just a quick fuck. sometimes he had never even struck a conversation, just fucked them real quick and dipped without a hello or goodbye. roger, brian and john were the only people he truly felt confident speaking with.

yes, he truly was shitting himself for matching day. the thought of hearing his name being spoken aloud by the mayor and hearing the sentence 'your soulmate is...' made freddie want to throw up.

john lifted his head up from freddie's shoulder, smiling sweetly with a splash of mischief. freddie was so grateful for the younger man. he had dragged him out of his writers block. he had managed to help freddie write a whole song, a song which they were both over the moon about. freddie wished his soulmate was as kind, sweet, funny and caring as john was. he wished his soulmate would share his taste in music and humour, like john did. he wished his soulmate would be as protective as him as freddie would be to them, just like him and john. he hoped that his soulmate would be intelligent like john. he even wished his soulmate would look like john with freddie absolutely loving everything about his best friend, from top to bottom.

or maybe, freddie thought, he just wished his soulmate was john.

♛

𝙃𝙀𝙇𝙇𝙊!𝙤𝙝 𝙢𝙮 𝙜𝙤𝙙.

𝘄𝗲𝗹𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗺𝘆 𝗯𝗿𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗻𝗲𝘄 𝗳𝗮𝗻𝗳𝗶𝗰, '𝗯𝗼𝗱𝘆 𝗲𝗹𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗿𝗶𝗰'!𝗶𝗺 𝘀𝘂𝗽𝗲𝗿 𝗲𝘅𝗰𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆, 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗶 𝗮𝗺 𝘀𝗼 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝘂𝗱 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗽𝘁𝗲𝗿. 𝗶'𝘃𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗳𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗶 𝗰𝗮𝗻'𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝗶𝘁 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆 𝘁𝗼 𝗱𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗹𝗼𝗽. 𝗶 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘀𝗼 𝗺𝗮𝗻𝘆 𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗮𝘀 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗳𝗮𝘃 𝗴𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝗵𝗲𝗵𝗲𝗵𝗲𝗵𝗲.𝗶 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗵𝗼𝗽𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗴𝘂𝘆𝘀 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗲𝗻𝗷𝗼𝘆 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗮𝘀 𝗺𝘂𝗰𝗵 𝗮𝘀 𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗲𝗻𝗷𝗼𝘆 𝘄𝗿𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀. 𝗶 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆 𝗺𝘂𝗰𝗵 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗸 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗲𝗻𝗱𝗹𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝘀𝘂𝗽𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁. 𝗶 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘀𝗲𝗲 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆 𝘃𝗼𝘁𝗲, 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗶𝗺 𝘀𝗼 𝗴𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗳𝘂𝗹 𝘁𝗼 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘀𝗼 𝗺𝗮𝗻𝘆 𝗮𝗺𝗮𝘇𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀.𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗺𝘆 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲- 𝗮𝗯𝘀 𝘅𝘅


	2. chapter two

tw/ there are brief mentions of sick/ vomit in the start of this chapter but nothing too graphic :)

♛

after many hours partying the night away, the four boys made their way home, limbs aching and heads fuzzy. brian and roger were completely pissed, with freddie having to accompany his little blonde friend whilst he vomited in the alley behind the club. whilst freddie was on roger duty, john was on brian duty, massaging the guitarists back as he threw up into the toilet. it was tiring, yes, but freddie and john both preferred it to be this way rather than letting their pissed up friends chuck up alone in public at 2am in the morning.

arriving back at the flat, brian announced he was 'hitting the hay' whilst roger rushed to the bathroom to chuck up again. freddie just shook his head at the disgusting sounds echoing from the toilet and forced himself to block any sounds emitting from the apartment.

after about ten minutes, the drummer re-appeared from the bathroom and strolled slowly towards his little bedroom, slurring what seemed like a 'goodnight' to john and freddie, who were sat in the living room chuckling at their drunken friends. they wished him a goodnight in return and john glanced up towards the ticking clock on the wall. 3:48am. it was nearly four o'clock in the morning and yet the bassist didn't feel an ounce of tiredness. he looked towards freddie who was also checking the time, but on his wristwatch. they were both a little tipsy but nowhere near brian and roger.

suddenly, freddie spoke up; "well, darling, i'm off to bed. thanks for being such a great help with those two nobheads," he joked, standing up from his place on the sofa, sighing softly. john smiled in return, telling freddie that 'it was not a problem' and wishing him a goodnight and sweet dreams. as freddie left the room, he took a quick glance at the younger boy who was still sat quietly on the sofa and then scurried off, not wanting to get caught mid-stare.

when freddie went to bed, john wasn't quite sure what to do with himself. technically, he could just hop into bed himself, but he knew he'd just lay awake for hours in immense boredom. not particularly fancying staring up into the darkness until morning, he decided to take a quick trip to the kitchen, grabbing a packet of ready salted crisps and a glass of water and then returning to the quiet living room. he walked up to the vhs player and looked through his endless pile of tapes.

his eyes settled on a movie that he hadn't watched in a good while (a good while meaning at least a week). it happened one night. he recalled watching this about six days ago, and it was definitely one of his favourite romance films. for starters, it was black and white and starred clark gable, so it was an automatic winner (john had fancied clark gable since forever). it also starred claudette colbert, the daughter of a very powerful man and the to-be-wife of a very rich man. but, she meets clark gable, a journalist and long story short, they go on a little adventure together and end up falling in love; john loved it tremendously.

the bassist placed the tape into the vhs player and retreated back to the comfortable sofa; he indulged in his packet of crisps and laid back, enjoying the tranquility of the room. it was just him and the tv. but, however much john didn't mind his own company, he did feel a tad lonely. he shook it off and continued with the movie.

an hour into the film, john felt so warm; romance films had a huge effect on him. it was definitely his favourite genre, yet they always reminded him of how lonely he was. considering it was nearing 5 o'clock in the morning, it was technically the next day, which meant there was one less day till matching day. 𝘀𝗶𝘅 𝗱𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝗴𝗼.

there was a sudden shuffling outside the door leading to the living room. john turned his head and set his eyes upon said door, waiting for someone to make their way inside. perhaps roger woke up for some water. john snuggled tighter into the pillow he didn't realise he had clutched to his chest. and then, on cue, the door opened.

"bloody hell, darling, what are you doing up at this hour?" freddie chuckled whilst wiping his sleepy eyes, possibly adjusting them to the light the television provided. the bassist let out a breath he was holding and loosened his grip on the pillow. he scooted up the sofa to allow freddie to sit down next to him and adjusted the blanket so it was only covering him.

"sorry. i couldn't sleep," john replied, rubbing the back of his neck whilst looking down at his lap. the younger boy could still see how tired the singer was and he couldn't help but wonder if he had been to sleep at all. he looked like shit, the rings around his eyes more prominent than usual and his movements were deathly slow. if freddie was this tired, why did he get up?

the singer nodded and squinted his eyes at the bright tv screen. "what are you watching this time, then?" he chuckled, leaning back on the chair and tugging some of the blanket away from john, draping it over his own legs. he brought an arm up behind his head and rested his head upon the bicep, still looking at the screen.

"an old one; it happened one night," the bassist answered, leaning back on the sofa and swell, taking the same position as freddie had done.

"ah, a black and white movie. they're my favourite," the older man confessed, turning his head to gaze at the bassist with a kind smile spread across his features. john returned the smile and then quickly looked back towards the tv.

the two of them sat in silence for a good ten minutes before john piped up again.

"freddie, you're knackered. why don't you go back to bed?" he offered. the singer put his hand into john's crisp packet and pulled out a handful, a cheeky grin evident on his face.

"i was the same as you, dear. i couldn't sleep, and i heard a little noise coming from here and so i went to investigate, finding you. and besides, i don't want to go back to bed. it's lonely; i much prefer sitting here with you," he spoke quietly. if he had spoken any quieter, john would have needed to ask him to repeat his words. but the bassist heard him clearly, blushing furiously at the last sentence.

"oh, okay." the younger boy didn't know how to reply without looking like a complete fool, and so he went all shy and shrunk down into the blanket a little more. this seemed to make the singer laugh and turn his attention back to the film. they both sat in silence throughout the rest of the film, although it wasn't an awkward silence. it was most comfortable. john despised people who constantly talked through movies and so he was mentally thanking freddie for not being one of those people.

as the credits rolled down the screen, john shifted to take the blanket off the two of them and started to stand up to retreat to his bedroom. however, before he stood up, he noticed freddie wasn't moving a muscle. he scanned over the older boy and cooed softly when he realised he was fast asleep, his features calm.

john had never seen freddie so vulnerable and he was flattered that the singer trusted him enough to fall asleep right next to him. he had also never seen freddie this quiet or calm. he chuckled at the thought. freddie was always the lively one, cracking jokes left right and centre, but now he was the complete opposite. the bassist watched his chest at it moved up and down along with his breathing. he also noticed that there was a strand of freddie's raven hair hanging down on his face, making his nose twitch slightly. john moved the hair away from his face, watching as the singer let out a heavy breath and fall into a steady breathing pattern again.

he was a very pretty sleeper, john concluded. he knew when he slept, his mouth would hang open in a most unflattering manner and he would drool all over his pillow. freddie's mouth was tightly shut and there was certainly no drool escaping his mouth. his lips were pouted and they looked incredibly soft; john stopped himself right there and turned away. he would not allow himself to indulge and fantasise over his best friend. he already felt like he was cheating on his soulmate, which was silly, really, considering john had never even met them.

john placed his hands on freddie's shoulders, shaking lightly. he could just leave his sleeping friend on the sofa, but he could see that freddie's neck was in an awkward position between his pillow and the arm of the chair and he didn't want to risk freddie's neck feeling absolutely terrible the next morning. after a few gentle shakes, freddie muttered to himself quietly but proceeded to sleep, making john sigh to himself.

"c'mon, freddie, it's time for bed," he whispered, continuing to shake him. he was seriously considering throwing a cup of cold water on his head at this point. he eyed up his own glass of tap water but decided against it, knowing freddie would never forgive him. but, he did start shaking a little harder, which did successfully make freddie open his tired eyes.

"hello sleepy. c'mon, let me take you to bed," the bassist smiled, but freddie shrieked at john's choice of wording. the younger boy didn't understand the reasoning for freddie's outburst until he looked back on what he had said.

"oh be quiet, that's not what i meant," he said, flustered. "now come on, you're much too heavy to carry and you need to get to bed."

"wow, thanks johnny. don't worry, i won't take it personally," freddie joked and ended his sentence with a wink and a little yawn. john couldn't help but look at his best friend with awe as he yawned, thinking it to be the cutest sight he has ever seen in his life.

john managed to convince freddie to get up from the sofa, and after turning off the tv and clearing up his stuff from the coffee table, he accompanied freddie in walking to his bedroom. freddie was wobbling terribly due to his tired and shaking legs; john didn't want to risk him toppling over and hurting himself, so he wrapped his arm around the singers neck and helped him to bed.

as they entered freddie's bedroom, they both noticed the tension in the room change drastically, but they both ignored it, not wanting to make a scene. john unwrapped his arm from freddie's neck, expecting the older boy to just hop into bed, but he just stood there. john, not knowing what to do, smiled and backed away, only to be stopped by freddie.

"wait." he whispered, and john obeyed. the bassist stood there, waiting for freddie to say something more. but he didn't. the singer just stood there and looked at john, his eyes remaining on his face. john just cracked a nervous smile and looked down at the floor.

"thank you for tonight, darling. the dancing, the help with those two dickheads-" john couldn't help but giggle at that. brian and roger had truly been a handful. "-and for letting me watch your movie with you." freddie continued, but john just raised an eyebrow.

"you hardly watched it, freddie. you fell asleep within twenty minutes," the younger boy laughed as did freddie, but he quickly covered his smile by constricting his jaw and placing his top lip over his teeth. john frowned.

"well, yes, i did didn't i?" freddie wondered, earning a shy nod from john. freddie cooed at the younger boy, in total awe of his shyness and how adorable he was.

the two boys stood in silence once again, john twiddling his thumbs and freddie darting his eyes around the room with his tongue in his cheek, not knowing what to say next. he didn't want the bassist to leave and so he was scared of just saying a 'goodnight'. he enjoyed john's company alot. he wanted to snuggle into the bassist but he knew that wouldn't be appropriate. he ended up speaking the last thing he wanted to say.

"well. goodnight." freddie hesitantly muttered, and john looked up. if freddie wasn't mistaken, it looked as if he didn't want to leave either, but that could just be his massive ego playing up again.

"night." john cracked a sad smile. but then, all of a sudden, freddie walked up to him and placed a gentle kiss on john's cheek. john didn't know how to react; his heart was going at an incredible pace, so fast john started to worry. he just knew his face would have burned up tremendously and he bet his face was as red as a tomato. his stomach filled with thousands of butterflies and he felt like his legs were going to give way. all because of a simple kiss to the cheek.

he suddenly didn't want freddie to pull away and just discard the kiss as a friendly gesture. the younger boy wanted to lean in and cover his face in hundreds of little kisses and then finally focus on his plush, delicate lips and-

he decided to just wing it. to stop freddie from pulling away, he took one step closer to the older man and softly tugged on his shirt, which was still the hawaiian shirt he had been wearing all day. john figured that he was too tired to change clothes and decided to just sleep in the current clothes he was in. john inwardly chuckled at the thought,

after what felt like forever, they both leaned in and met eachothers lips halfway. john instantly noticed that he had totally underestimated how soft freddie's lips were. they were heavenly. john hadn't kissed many lips to compare them to, but he already knew that they were the best lips ever. he tasted like cigarettes and champagne with a splash of perfume (which he was sure was womans), something that was so distinctly freddie.

freddie was most surprised when he felt john kissing back. he had always preached that he only wanted to kiss and have romantic relations with his soulmate, and so the fact that he hadn't pushed freddie away yet was very interesting. freddie wasn't complaining, though. he was taken back to the month or two when he was totally head over heels for the young bassist, and he remembered all of the nights he spent awake wishing that john was with him, kissing him softly. and now that dream was coming true. john didn't show any signs of wanting to stop, either.

the two of them kissed slowly yet feverishly, with freddie carefully wrapping his arms around the bassists waist and bringing him a little closer. john quietly moaned at the touch, and when john brought his hands up to freddie's hair, running his hands through the dark locks, freddie himself moaned, which seemed to wake john up.

what am i doing? i promised myself years ago that i would only kiss my soulmate this passionately. kissing like this usually ends in sex, but that's a no go. no matter how much i'm attracted to freddie, im only allowing my soulmate to take my virginity. 

however, whilst they were kissing, they'd both be lying if they said they didn't feel an instant connection; electricity. they had always been told that you only felt electricity when you come into contact with your soulmate. there was even a definition.

*body electric (noun)*

*the 'electricity' you feel when coming into contact with your chosen soulmate. contact can include hugging, kissing or even being in the same room as one another*

*one can only feel body electric with one other person*

their mouth moved against each other with such an urgency and sense of want that john was taken aback. he knew his lips would be swollen and perhaps even bruised with hickeys (can you get hickeys on your lips?) , but that didn't matter. they would be marks caused by freddie during a moment of passion and that thought alone made john feel all tingly.

john thought back to the time when he was hopelessly devoted to freddie. he would watch freddie perform on stage in front of thousands and fall more and more in love. whenever he caught his eye during his performance, john would feel like the only person in the world, even if there were thousands of screaming fans chanting freddie's name.

what did the electricity mean? it was strictly said that you could only feel body electric with one other person. did this mean something? surely not. the chances of being matched with your best friend were so small, it almost never happened. when john first felt the electricity when his lips met with freddie's, he led himself to believe that he had found him; freddie was his soulmate. he beat the system. he found his soulmate before the sodding government did. he felt on top of the world. but he didn't want to get his hopes up, and so he quickly discarded the thought. there was no way.

after minutes of kissing and touching, freddie pulled away, no matter how hard it was for him to do so. they gazed into each others eyes before john let out a little laugh at how absurd the situation was. it was some proper cheesy romance storyline.

"im sorry." freddie broke the silence. john furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

"what are you sorry for?" the bassist replied, not daring to step away from freddie. he wanted to remain as close to him as possible. he couldn't bear the thought of distancing himself from freddie; the singer radiated warmth and happiness and john didn't want to part with that.

"i know how much you wanted to share your first....proper romantic kiss.. with your soulmate, and i fucked that up. im sorry, i should have respected your wishes." john felt like laughing at the older man for his completely twisted thoughts, but he also felt his heartbreaking at the thought of freddie feeling guilty for what had just happened between them.

"freddie, look at me." john commanded, and the singer obeyed, slowly lifting his head up and meeting john's eyes. john smiled softly which caused freddie to crack a smile. "do i look like i care about the saving the kiss for the soulmate stuff?" john laughed. freddie let out a little snigger but continued to look sad.

"but you stood by that for so long. you shouldn't just throw away your promises to yourself and stuff. it was important to you." the singer frowned. john placed his hand on freddie's shoulder and slowly caressed it.

"did you feel it?" john whispered ever so quietly.

"feel what?"

"the body electric?"

freddie looked into john's eyes, keeping a straight face. he nodded.

"yes."

♛

five days later

one day to go

it was the night of queen's gig at a local bar which was probably just a ten minute car journey from the apartment they all shared together. yes, they were the biggest selling band in the world at the current moment, but they still liked to perform without the thousands of screaming fans; sometimes they just liked to perform at a chill bar doing what they loved. and that was exactly what they were going to do tonight.

tensions and spirits were already high due to the fact that it was matching day tomorrow. all the young people in britain were either terribly excited or shitting themselves. freddie was one of those who were shitting themselves.

ever since john and freddie's kiss in the older boys bedroom, the two of them couldn't be separated. every morning freddie would take the seat next to john at the kitchen table, and if the seat was already taken, he would demand to sit there, leaving a heavily blushing john. they would always sit next to eachother on the sofa. it was little things like that which made both boys hearts beat a million miles per hour.

they were both very skeptical regarding matching day. john had recently being doing countless research on 'body electric'... could you really only feel it with one person? is that one person always your soulmate? if so, that could only mean one thing...

at first john thought his mind was playing cruel tricks on him, that he didn't really feel the electricity, his mind was just leading himself to believe that freddie was his soulmate because he had once longed for that possibility for ages. it was then when freddie admitted he felt it too and john almost jumped the poor singer.

freddie always liked to surprise the band with his stage costumes, with them being tremendously flamboyant. the last outfit he wore was a latex body piece. it was white, green and orange and it was harlequin styled. although the costume definitely caught the audience's attention, it was super tight, meaning the costume wasn't the only thing that caught everyone's eye.

when they arrived at the bar, a nice man with long hair and a goatee led them through the back of the building to their dressing room, which they all shared since they were comfortable changing around each other due to the fact that they were best friends. roger instantly fled to the mirror to adjust his hair and even dab on some makeup. he was most likely planning on going home with a girl, if not multiple girls. when the unknown man left, roger spoke up.

"these mirrors are fucking grim."

the rest of the band nodded. the room wasn't the grandest of places, but considering that the four of them had been in much much worse dressing rooms in their early days, they decided to brush it off. it was something. however, john noticed freddie's look of disgust as he was forced to sit on the floor to pop on his shoes.

freddie then disappeared behind a little curtain to get changed into 'the main event', as he called it. he didn't take more than ten minutes, and he waltzed out in extreme confidence.

john's jaw dropped. freddie was dressed in the smallest, cutest red and white striped popcorn shorts, which were attached to a set of red braces. john didn't allow himself to fantasise on freddie for long, though, turning away and fiddling with his belt buckle after telling freddie he looked 'positively fabulous'.

"why thank you darling," he replied, winking at the bassist.

♛

as they walked onto stage holding their instruments and microphone, the audience greeted them with a polite applause and a few 'woop!''s. this is much better than people screaming at you left right and centre, john concluded.

freddie always seemed to win over every crowd, wether that crowd was 50 people or 50,000 people. even if the gig they did was a small little thing in a tiny little pub, he gave it his all, singing until his voice was painfully hoarse. he always carried around strepsils to help his throat, the cost he had to pay for being an incredible singer. he strutted around the stage like a god, and john would be lying if he said he didn't get a little excited.

john plugged in his bass to his amp, the one he had made himself, and danced his calloused fingers across the strings to test the waters. when some notes sounded a little off, he twisted knobs at the top of the instrument to tune it up. he strummed the strings again. perfect.

they launched in to 'let me entertain you', from the album jazz. they almost always started with this song, and freddie nailed it every time. of course he did, he's perfect, john's inner voice said, and he demanded his mind to snap out of it.

whenever freddie turned and caught his eye, john's tummy filled with butterflies, as it did back when he was in his freddie phase. he felt like a teenage girl. he was almost certain that freddie was going to be matched with him tomorrow, the body electric near enough proved it. there was no other explanation. freddie had to be his.

john wondered what the rest of the world would think when he was matched with freddie mercury, the most famous frontman in the world. he wondered if it would affect their music sales. surely not? they couldn't help the fact that they were made for each other. john already knew about queen's fanbase and how teenage girls already 'shipped' him and freddie together, and so john pondered wether those girls would go into cardiac arrest. probably, he chuckled.

the bassist knew he was getting his hopes up again. but he had to be right?

and then, john heard the all too familiar entrance beats to a familiar song. one of his favourite songs, actually, due to the live performance. liar. 

in the middle of the song, freddie always walked up to him, leant his head on his shoulder and sung effortlessly into the microphone. if john was really lucky, freddie would occasionally rub himself up and down john's thigh, but that was only if the frontman was in a good mood.

luckily, that was exactly the case.

as freddie walked over to him about to sing the 'all day long' section, john could feel the heat already rising in his cheeks, and when freddie looked him in the eye with a mischievous glint, he swore he could feel his trousers getting a little too tight.

freddie did what he always did; turned around, leaning his head on john's shoulder (john could smell his lemon shampoo- it was intoxicating) and faced the microphone in between the two of them. freddie's voice sounded beautiful; like an angel. and whenever john's part came up, he would softly sing "all day long", secretly not wanting his voice to be entirely heard by the audience.

and then, john felt freddie gently rub up and down on his thigh. he cursed the singer because at this rate, his trousers were going to get too too tight. thank god he had his bass guitar so he could hide his... erection.

freddie knew exactly what he was doing. the bassist could hear the smirk in his singing voice. john almost whined when freddie pulled away from him, but he needed to get his head in gear for his bass solo, which was coming up any second.

he shyly strutted forward, licking the tips of his fingers to ease the soreness he felt due to the endless plucking of the strings he had been doing the past half hour. and then he played his solo effortlessly, not missing one single beat.

what john didn't know, however, was that freddie was watching him perform his solo from behind, his own erection forming rather quickly.

♛

"well done darlings! you all did bloody amazing!" freddie cheered on the way back to the dressing room they all shared.

"thanks fred, you did amazingly too." roger replied, giving the singer a soft pat on the back. brian did the same whilst roger went over and slung his arm over john's neck.

"and you, deaky! that bass solo!" he near-enough screamed, which made john's cheeks heat up; john thought he had a problem with his cheeks bloody heating up every five seconds.

"oh, john. that bass solo was terrific, darling. perhaps the best you've ever done." freddie shoved into john softly and winked, earning a shy smile from the bassist.

"thanks guys," john whispered, looking down at the floor, overwhelmed by the compliments.

♛

after twenty minutes or so, roger and brian exited the dressing room having finished. they mentioned meeting john and freddie at the bar when they had both finished up changing. they both agreed and they were left alone in the room.

"you did really well tonight, darling." freddie perked up, unstrapping one of the red braces and setting it down on the table beside the huge mirror. john looked down on freddie's reflection in said mirror and his breath was almost taken away. beautiful.

"thanks, freddie. you too," he returned with a rosy grin, unbuttoning his shirt drenched in sweat to change into a drier one. he could've swore he could see freddie's eyes linger on his bare chest for a few seconds, but he thought his mind was just playing tricks on him and he let it go.

and then, freddie got up and walked over to the chair that john's fresh shirt was draped over. he picked up the clothing and handed it to a shirtless john. "there you go darling."

it was the classic cliché romance movie scene; as john went to take the shirt, freddie held onto it, refusing to let it go.

instead of pissing about, john just yanked the shirt forward, causing freddie's lips to collide with his in a most desperate manner. the bassist could hear freddie gasp in surprise, but he didn't hesitate to kiss john back with just as much passion.

if john and freddie weren't matched tomorrow, they'd both be royally fucked.

♛

𝗵𝗶 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘀! 𝗵𝗼𝗽𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗲𝗻𝗷𝗼𝘆𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗽𝘁𝗲𝗿! 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗻𝗲𝘅𝘁 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗽𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗯𝗲 𝗺𝗮𝘁𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝘀𝗼 𝘆𝗮𝘆 𝗳𝘂𝗻 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲𝘇.  
𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝘂 𝗮𝗹𝗹!  
-𝗮𝗯𝘀 𝘅

*not proofread*


	3. chapter three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi guys!!  
> i know there was alot of confusion with timelines and stuff, but ive also changed a few things  
> •queen are no longer famous. sorry, i know thats a big change but it just makes the story easier? their fame shall rise during the story though!  
> •this fic can be whatever era you want. i’ve written 1977 but i know john and freddie wrote cool cat in the first chapter but honestly, that doesn’t really play a part lmao...
> 
> i hope you enjoy!

matching day

john woke up around about 8:30 on the day, riddled with excitement but also with a splash of fear. not fear of being matched, but more of actually introducing himself to his soulmate. he had never been a particularly confident or loud individual, and he would much rather stay home with his current friends than go out and meet new ones. he was an incredibly anxious lad and he was thankful that freddie, brian or roger never forced him to go out to their infamous parties on the weekends or speak up during press interviews. the only time he ever really spoke to interviewers was when he was asked a question directly, but other than that, he stayed quiet, just sat in his chair watching as his bandmates answered most of the press. 

everyone had to be at the matching centre at 10am (despite everyone agreeing that this was much too early) so soulmates could spend the rest of the day together. that's what was expected anyways. considering it was nearing 9 am due to john laying in bed alone with his thoughts for half hour, and he had a slight panic as he realised they only had an hour to get dressed, eat and get to the matching centre, which was a good 20 minute drive. they had originally planned to walk, but they thought it would be better to get a taxi considering they were all lazy shits at heart. 

the bassist hopped out of bed with so much excitement that he almost stumbled over his own feet, but he managed to catch himself just in time. he practically ran out of his room and barged into roger's room, waking up by shaking him dramatically by the shoulders. after the blonde had sat up in bed, finally awake, john did the same with brian despite having an earful of insults from the drummer. brian didn't really care that much, he just sat up and wished john a good morning. john then creeped into freddie's room and did the same, shaking him until he opened his eyes.

"jesus christ darling, excited are we?" freddie spoke, his hoarse morning voice making john swoon. the bassist just nodded his head rapidly, then rushing out of the older boys room, making his way to the kitchen. he prepared some simple ham and cucumber sandwiches for roger and freddie and a cheese salad sandwich for brian, due to him being a raging vegetarian. he called each boys names loudly, and as each one of them entered the kitchen, john shoved their respective sandwiches into their hands and told them all to 'shove these down your throats and get dressed- we're gonna be late'.

john himself then went to get changed into his best clothes, wanting to make a good and lasting impression on his soulmate. even if it did turn out to be freddie, who had seen him at his worst, he didn't care. he wanted to look good, even if that meant adding a teeny bit of eyeshadow and pink lip balm. he knew freddie would have eyeliner, lippy and perhaps some mascara anyways, so what was the harm? 

after john rushing around the apartment, panicking because it was now nearly 9:30, freddie taking his sweet time with his makeup and choice of outfit, roger eating almost everything in the fridge and then downing a bottle of pepsi and brian scalding roger for eating all their food, the four friends left, making their way to the matching centre.

even though they were all pretty calm on the outside, they would be lying if they said they were all calm and collected on the inside. roger was secretly stressing himself out; what if his soulmate didn't like him? didn't like the way he dressed or looked, or the way he blurted out overly sexual innuendos daily. brian was sweating too; what if his soulmate didn't like him because he was a vegetarian? it sounded ridiculous, but it was something brian was immensely worried about.

freddie was more hopeful than anything. hopeful that his soulmate was the younger bassist who was currently strolling next to him. and if it wasn't john, then he hoped his soulmate would accept him for who he is; that they didn't judge him for wearing occasional makeup and his outrageous stage gear. and his biggest worry was that they wouldn't like him because of his appearance, especially his humongous teeth. he knew he was rather exotic looking, and he actually liked that about himself. but if his teeth fucked this up for him, he'd never be able to stop crying. on the inside, freddie was incredibly shy.

john was just hoping that his soulmate was kind, funny and perhaps just as shy as he was. he wanted them to be romantic and selfless and easy to talk to. he didn't really care for looks. it was the inside that counted and he never judged a book by its cover.

the four boys walked for what seemed like forever but was realistically about 15 minutes. they had unknowingly all been power walking so they got there with about ten minutes to spare until they all had to be seated. freddie claimed that he needed a smoke to calm his nerves, which is why all four of them were stood outside the huge building decorated with banners and signs that said matching day 1979.

"i'm shitting myself." the singer told his friends with a quivering voice. they all nodded in agreement and roger lit his own cigarette. brian just shook his head having told all his friends that smoking will kill them one day, but they never listened. john didn't smoke either.

"same here. i just hope they're hot," roger smirked, earning an eye roll from freddie. 

"wow, rog. how nice of you. and what if they're not hot?"

"well if i cheat then ill be put to death or something so honestly? i have no clue."

john's jaw dropped at the drummers attitude, which made roger let out a loud laugh. "you're too soft deaky. what're you hoping yours is like?"  
after john glanced over at freddie who was already looking at him with a nice smile,  
john situated his eyes back on his blonde friend.  
"um.. someone who is kind. i don't really care about their.. looks. just someone who i can easily talk to y'no?" the bassist answered, looking down at his feat and blushing.  
roger cooed at john's response.

suddenly, a loud speaker spoke out to the rest of the people waiting outside the building. freddie sprung up from his leaning position on the wall behind him and tensed every muscle in his body. roger gulped and dropped his cigarette, proceeding to step on it to put out the fire. john looked straight at the door which people were now making their way towards. he felt his forehead starting to sweat and he felt slightly dizzy. brian seemed the most calm of them all, but he was fidgeting with his fingers out of nervousness.

they made a beeline towards the door together and they tried to find four empty seats lined up next to each other so they could freak out together. with brian being 6"2, he could easily peer over the many heads in the colossal hall and he spotted four seats. he led his friends towards them, apologising to everyone he bumped into and saying 'excuse me' at least fifty times.

the hall was crowded. each face had a different expression: fear, stress, excitement, amazement. every person in this room was going to be told who they would spend the rest of their lives with, and this realisation alone made john tremble. he made sure to look at as many faces as possible, mostly focusing on the men, knowing that with each face he casted his gaze upon, he could be looking at his soulmate for the first time.

brian was followed by roger, then freddie and then john. they all sat down in unison, each one of them shaking with anticipation. as everyone else was settling, john reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a packet of polo mints.  
"polo?" he whispered to freddie, holding out the mints. the singer nodded and john pushed the mint out of its wrapper and it fell into freddie's hand. he popped it in his mouth and thanked john. 

john placed a mint into his own mouth, giving him something to suck on to distract himself from the nerves that were building up in his body. he could see freddie shaking a little out of the corner of his eye. he was also sucking on his mint, perhaps distracting himself too. 

deep down, john knew he secretly wanted freddie to be his soulmate. it wasn't just because he fancied him a teeny tiny bit either. freddie was his best friend, his confidant. he could rely on him for anything. he was funny, outrageous and funny. but he was also shy and quiet at times, which john thought was just precious. and even though john didn't care for looks, he'd be lying if he said freddie wasn't attractive. he looked so exotic and different; john loved it.

with precisely a minute to go until the speaker came onto the stage to call out names and match them with other names, john didn't know what to do with himself. he sat up and turned his head, scanning each face in the room. there were a few nice looking boys, but none of them caught his eye. there were also a few nice looking girls but that was out of the question.

john was counting down the seconds until the ceremony started. 20, 19, 18, 17, 16, 15...

as it reached ten seconds, john turned to freddie, getting the older boys attention. the singer exchanged a warm smile which john returned. the bassist looked into his eyes and whispered ever so quietly that it was only freddie who could hear him.  
"i really hope it's you."  
and with that, the speaker walked on stage.

after every name was called, the person had to stand up and wait for their soulmate to stand up. they'd then be able to wave at eachother from across the hall, maybe even exchange a cheeky wink or flirty smirk. it warmed john and freddie's hearts as they sometimes saw gay couples being matched and it was a massive relief that nobody even questioned it. because of the fact that the soulmate system was never wrong, nobody spoke up about any relationship that may seem wrong in their eyes. it wasn't for them to decide; it was the governments.

and then suddenly, the speaker called out 'roger taylor'. john, freddie and brian whipped their heads towards him as he slowly stood up, shaking. freddie grasped his hand and squeezed it softly, giving the drummer a sense of comfort and it calmed him down a little bit. 

there was a dramatic pause which didn't help roger's nerves in the slightest, and then the words 'your soulmate is...' rung out throughout the hall.  
there was another dramatic pause. freddie could feel the drummers hand starting to sweat and shake once more, and the singer wanted to strangle the speaker on stage for making roger more tense and forcing him to wait longer.

the speaker opened his mouth and called out 'brian may'.

the four of them froze, roger especially. the drummer looked straight at brian, so quickly that he thought he might have given himself whiplash. brian's eyes widened until roger thought they were going to pop out. brian didn't move. his whole body just stood still. his breathing stopped and it was as if he was glued to the seat. brian didn't stop looking at roger, however. but, he was lost in his own thoughts.

"stand up you dimwit!" freddie hissed at the guitarist, bringing brian out of his state of shock. roger brought his eyes up to the stage again as brian ever so slowly stood up. a round of applause followed shortly after, and freddie and john looked at eachother, eyebrows raised and mouths wide open. they were both trying to stifle laughs as they watched their two friends stand up in the middle of the room. 

"oh you're sat next to eachother! how fantastic!" the speaker chuckled through his microphone. brian and roger, however, still didn't move. they didn't hug, kiss, hold hands or anything. they just stood there, which was very unusual to everyone else in the room.  
they both sat down in unison, still not exchanging words.

roger didn't even know he was gay? was he gay? he'd always been with girls and he had never even looked at brian in that way before. sure, he was attractive, and roger had a soft spot for his poodle hair and his gentleness, but he had to admit that he never once thought about being in a relationship with the man. they got on eachothers nerves too often.

brian was in the same boat: roger was pretty, sure. brian was bisexual so it also made a tiny bit of sense. but, he couldn't say that he'd ever lay awake at night wishing that roger was his. frankly, the drummer got on his nerves an awful lot, and they were practically opposites. but maybe opposites attract? he had no idea.

at this point, freddie had took john's hand and laced their fingers together whilst hiding it under the arm of freddie's chair. john could feel how tense freddie was, and john was sure his hands were clammy and horrible, but freddie didn't seem to mind. they had gone through so many names, surely they were bound to come up soon?

'freddie mercury'. freddie's name rang out throughout the room, and this time, his friends' heads turned to look at him. freddie quickly turned to look into john's eyes and he cracked a small, hopeful smile before rubbing his thumb across the back of john's hand, letting go and standing up. he brushed the creases out of his trousers and look around the room.

'your soulmate is...' - dramatic pause. freddie almost stuck his middle finger up to the speaker but he managed to stop himself in time. he tried to remain as cool and collected as possible, not noticing his forehead starting to sweat.

'john deacon!'

the biggest smile crept up onto freddie's face as he looked down towards his little friend. john squealed and started to stand up, taking freddie's hand in his once again, squeezing it. john went in for a hug and freddie happily returned it. 

but they noticed nobody was clapping. the room remained silent. freddie let go of john and scowled at everyone around the room. he looked towards the stage and he witnessed a woman rush towards the speaker. she whispered something in his ear and passed him a separate piece of paper. john noticed this too and his heart was pacing. however, he refused to leave freddie's side.

the speaker put the microphone back towards his mouth and spoke again.

'im sorry, there's been a little bit of a mix up. freddie, your match is mark austin."

john's heart crumbled. it literally shattered. he didn't know what to do with himself. forcing himself not to cry in front of everyone, he sat back down, twiddling his thumbs, tears filling his eyes. 

freddie's legs almost gave way. how the fuck did this happen? his eyes threatened to spill tears at any second as he watched john sit back town and start to play with his thumbs. he desperately wanted john to look back up at him and go back to hugging him, but he knew that wasn't possible. he forced himself to drag his eyes away from the bassist, who was most definitely crying now, and look around the room.

on the other side stood a man who wore a tight fitting shirt and tight jeans. freddie slightly raised his eyebrow but then managed to smile at the man, mark apparently. mark held up his hand to wave and then he winked at freddie, which made the singer want to curl up into a ball and never come out. he wanted to be winked at by john, not some random bloke with too many muscles.

freddie quickly sat back down again and the ceremony continued. john was still twiddling his thumbs, and freddie so so wished he could comfort the young boy, but that would seem too suspicious. he was matched now. he had a soulmate. if anybody saw freddie getting too close to john, they might report it. perhaps freddie was being paranoid, but he didn't want to risk it. if he got reported, there was a chance that he might be thrown in jail, and the only thing worse than not being matched with john was not being able to see john ever again. freddie almost sobbed at the thought.

the singers eyes were still filled with tears. his hand was itching to take johns. the younger boy was still looking down at his feet, refusing to look at freddie. john knew that if he looked up and met freddie's eyes, he wouldn't be able to control his emotions. he would sob uncontrollably and fall into freddie's arms. he stuck to crying on his own, slapping his two thumbs together and gazing at his shoes.

brian and roger weren't speaking either. maybe they were too much in shock to exchange words just yet. freddie didn't blame them.

the name 'john deacon' was spoken aloud. john's head sprung up, and freddie's heart almost exploded with pain as he saw that his cheeks were tear stained and his eyes were red. the bassist wiped said eyes on his sleeves and managed to build up the strength to get up from his seat.

looks of sympathy were all around. everybody had witnessed his and freddie's little cockup, and everybody had seen how thrilled john was to be matched with his best friend. and everybody had seen their reactions to being told they weren't actually soulmates. it was cruel, and both boys hearts were broken.

'your soulmate is...'  
dramatic pause.  
john was fed up with these fucking pauses.  
'veronica tetzlaff'

a pretty girl stood up in front of john. she turned around and their eyes met. veronica smiled gracefully at john. the bassist just nodded and raised his fingers a little to wish her a hello.

as if his day couldn't get any fucking worse, he was matched with a woman. he was gay for crying out loud.

there must be something wrong this year. all his life, people had strictly told him that the soulmate system was always right. the government know best. just listen to them and you won't get yourselves in trouble. well, it turns out that john was beginning to doubt the whole soulmate crap and the government itself. the bassist knew he could get in deep trouble for having these thoughts, but at the current moment, he couldn't care less. they had gotten it wrong. surely.

he took his seat once again, this time looking straight ahead. his look of sadness had replaced itself with a look of incredible anger. how was he suspected to live with a woman in a romantic relationship for the rest of his life? he established three years ago that he was gay. 

"john?"  
he heard a faint whisper coming from beside him. it was freddie. john was so thankful for hearing his voice again. it soothed him. 

john turned towards freddie and he saw an immense look of heartbreak and sorrow in his eyes. they both wanted nothing more than to envelope eachother in a hug. but they couldn't. not anymore.

"hi," john replied, a sad smile upon his tired face.  
"hi darling." freddie muttered under his breath, so only he and john could hear the pet name. john almost jumped the singer there and then. 

they just looked at each other for a long moment. it was like everybody around them had just evaporated into thin air. it was only them, and john wanted to keep it that way.

"im sorry." freddie blurted out, making john terrible confused. "what for?" 

"for not being good enough to be your soulmate. i so wanted it to be you, johnny." the singer returned a sad smile. this time it was him who looked down, only to look straight back up when john started speaking.

"freddie don't be ridiculous. sometimes life doesn't work out the way we want it to. but it'll be okay in the end. i'm sure you'll come to love mark... that's his name, right?"

"i don't even know, darling. i wasn't listening" freddie managed to let out a little chuckle, as did john.  
"you're an idiot sometimes, freddie,"  
"i know."

♛

twenty minutes till the end of the matching process, john started having a little panic attack. freddie noticed straight away and attempted to calm to younger boy down by rubbing his back and asking an assistant to grab him some water. after that, brian and roger caught on too, trying to help freddie with calming down john.

"freddie, its wrong! i can't be matched with a girl... im gay, freddie. im fucking gay. how do they expect me-"  
john's breathing was rapid and shallow, and freddie ordered him to take another large gulp of water. john did as he was told, placing the bottle to his lips and chugging away. it hurt to swallow. everything hurt, from john's chest to his head.

"i know darling, i know. we'll speak to the lady who ran across the stage earlier, okay?" the singer reassured. but this only made john panic more.

"no, freddie! they'll- they'll think im trying to g-get out of it, and where will they send me? prison! f-forever!" he stuttered. the people around them were also aware of john's panic and so they didn't bat an eyelid when freddie wrapped his arms around him in a comforting bear hug. 

"i-i don't want to be put in prison freddie. i really really don't"  
freddie shushed the younger boy. "i know darling, i know. but you won't, don't you worry."

"i can't-"  
"look, john. yes you can. you're going to meet up with veronica, okay? and you're going to make an epic impression. you're going to fall in love with her and you'll be happy with her, i promise. she seems nice, and she's very pretty. trust me, darling"

john was silent for a few seconds before meeting his eyes with freddie's for the hundredth time today.  
"okay." he whispered, so quiet freddie barely heard him.

freddie knew they couldn't be together. not now. he had to force john out of his mind and heart. he was with mark now. he had to be. he couldn't risk at putting john in jail. that was out of the question. this was how life was now. they had to suck it up and deal with it.

♛

after the matching process had finished, everyone entered another room which was full of refreshments and entertainment. this was the stage where everyone met up with their respective soulmates and got to know them a little bit. it was like a starter date that lasted around an hour. afterwards, they'd make the choice of what they wanted to do, wether they wanted to go on a second date straight afterwards or save it for another day.

freddie, brian, roger and john stuck together until freddie and john's soulmates found them. brian and roger had nipped off to get some drinks for the four of them together, and they were back within five minutes. brian and roger already knew everything about one another which was lucky for them. 

freddie and john couldn't bear to exchange any more words. no matter how much they wanted to, they both knew that if they spoke to one another, they'd both end up crying.

john knew freddie was right; veronica did seem nice and she was pretty. but she was a girl. but maybe this just meant that john was perhaps bisexual? the soulmate system was never wrong, no matter how much john resented it at the moment.  
john was going to try his hardest to make this work. he was going to erase all of the romantic thoughts about his best friend from his mind. freddie was his best friend, and that's all he would ever be. they could never be together and they both knew that. when the speaker accidentally paired them, they were both over the moon. that feeling lasted a mere five seconds before both their hearts were broken. but john believed in the power of the universe. perhaps this was a sign that him and freddie weren't meant to be? maybe he'll be thankful in the long run?

"john deacon?" a small, sweet voice said behind the bassists back. john spun around to meet a woman. she was a little smaller than him and she had long hair which reached just below her shoulders, dark blonde in colour. she had a petite heart shaped face and a button nose. she was very quite pretty. 

"t-that's me." he awkwardly replied, sticking out his hand for her to shake it. she did, and he wasn't surprised. no body electric.  
it seemed as if she was surprised too. it looked like she was expecting to feel the body electric, but after nothing happened, a look of confusion flashed across her face. 

"hi, im veronica. but you can call me ronnie." she gave him a bright smile and he returned it, not wanting to seem rude.

suddenly, they were interrupted by a bouncing roger. "hellooo veronica! im john's best friend, roger, but they all call me rog or something,"

john was surprised at roger's outburst, first coming to the conclusion that roger might be drunk. but that was impossible since alcohol wasn't being served at the venue.

"oh, hello roger," she answered, also giving the drummer a smile. she seems awfully kind, john thought.

"hi, ronnie. can i call you ronnie?" brian politely asked, and 'ronnie' gave a small nod in return. "hi ronnie, im brian." he continued, grinning.

and that just left freddie to introduce himself. john and freddie met each others gazes before the singer forced himself to man up and stop being stupid. 

"hello, darling. i'm freddie, another one of john's best friends." freddie kept his hands to himself, placing them behind his back as he introduced himself. john could see that ronnie tensed up at the pet name but shook it off, leaving john to have a little private chuckle.

after a while, mark came up to freddie and whisked him away from his group of friends. john could easily see that freddie found him attractive, and he couldn't help the surge of jealousy that passed through his veins. he needed to snap himself out of it and fast. he was with ronnie now. she was his soulmate.

the first step to snapping himself out of it was getting away from freddie. and he did just that. he took ronnie to a sweet hole-in-the-wall italian resturant called capriccios which was in the next street from the matching centre. they were seated at a little romantic table decorated with a small vase of tulips and a candle which smelled of berries.

they took their seats and john watched as ronnie picked up her menu and cast her eyes over the options.  
"so, ronnie. tell me about yourself?" john started. okay john. good conversation starter.

"haha, um.. im 22. i was born in sheffield and i went to maria assumpta teacher training college... im really rather uninteresting, i tell you-"

freddie would often end his sentences with 'i tell you', john noticed. he quickly diffused his thoughts.

"you're plenty interesting i'm sure." john picked up his menu and started to choose what he wanted. 

♛

mark was nice. that was the first thing freddie gathered on his soulmate. realistically, he was his type. freddie would find himself going for the more macho muscular men in the gay clubs. but that was before john. john was the complete opposite. he was small, thin and shy. and freddie adored it.

mark was tall and had a booming voice. he had dark blonde hair, just like veronica, and he wore incredibly tight clothing. so tight that it made freddie slightly claustrophobic. it was a definite turn off. but hey, that was him, and he was his soulmate. he'd have to get used to it.

instead of taking freddie on a romantic date like at a restaurant, mark led him to a gay club. how cliché, freddie thought. not that he was complaining; freddie loved gay clubs. he loved the environment and the people. he loved being able to be his true self without being judged relentlessly.

"so, darling, tell me about yourself," freddie smirked. he had to at least try and help this relationship work. 

"well, im 22. i was born in fulham and the rest is history really."

freddie had to suppress a sign; out of all people, freddie mercury is matched with the most boring man on the universe.

"what about you?" mark added on after ordering his and freddie's drinks. freddie went for a large vodka and tonic. heck he'd need it.

"well, im 21. i was born in zanzibar-" mark cut freddie off.  
"where's zanzibar?"  
"oh. u-um.. africa," freddie smiled, masking how irritated he was at mark for suddenly cutting him off. he swallowed it down and continued talking.

"my family wasn't rich but we were well off.. i was shipped off to boarding school in india, and then in '64 i came here." 

freddie wouldn't normally talk about his childhood but he figured if he was supposed to spend the rest of his life with mark then he'd have to be a little more open. the only people that knew about his childhood apart from his family were brian, roger and john.

"wow, you certainly had a different upbringing," mark laughed and freddie chuckled whilst nodding. 

"wanna dance?" mark called over the music, pointing his thumb at the dance floor.  
freddie wasn't really in the mood but he nodded anyways. 

when on the dancefloor, freddie noticed mark getting a little handsy with him. he understood, though. they were soulmates, after all. they had to be a little flirty and sexual at times even if freddie didn't want it at that exact moment. if he rejected mark, he feared mark would tell someone and he'd get reported. this whole soulmate system was full of paranoia.

mark started grinding up against freddie's leg and freddie found himself grimacing. he didn't mean to; mark was a nice man. he was handsome and was freddie's type. he just couldn't imagine a whole life with him. 

♛

john walked into the apartment he shared with his friends, quietly closing the door behind him. it was 7:42pm. after john's date with veronica, he took a good two hour walk around the large park over the road from the apartment. in those two hours he thought everything over. yet he was still confused about everyone and everything.

veronica was nice. she was pretty, kind and actually quite funny. they had shared some good laughs together, but john couldn't shake the feeling of thinking of ronnie as just a friend. john didn't feel anything romantically for veronica, but he figured those would come later on. he'd only known her for a day, surely he wouldn't love her just yet? 

all the books and information about soulmates said otherwise. it was always said that when you first saw your soulmate in that matching centre, an overwhelming slap of love overtook your whole body. you would feel instant body electric. you would feel like you're dreaming. and at the end of the date, you would find yourself not wanting to leave them. at the end of john and ronnie's date, john couldn't wait to return home to his friends.

he placed his keys on the table beside the front door and hung his coat on the coat hook on his left. he made his way to the kitchen first, grabbing himself a glass of pepsi. then he made a beeline to the living room, only to find freddie flicking through the channels on the tv mindlessly.

as soon as john entered the room, freddie looked up with a face full of delight. "darling! you're back!" he smiled. he looked very relieved to see that john had returned home for the night.

"i am back indeed. couldn't stand the thought of staying at another persons house just yet. i missed my bed," john laughed, flopping down onto the sofa next to freddie. "where are brian and roger?"

"talking in brian's room." freddie smirked.  
john giggled at freddie but then realised what his innuendo was. he pulled a look of disgust which made freddie's heart ache.

"how was your date?" john then asked freddie, leaning his head back on the cushion of the chair. he looked at freddie as the singer turned to face him and gave him a sad smile.

"i-it was nice," the older boy hesitantly said, fidgeting with his fingers, just like john was in the matching centre just after it was announced that freddie wasn't his soulmate after all.  
the bassist raised his eyebrows as if to say 'really?'

freddie then leaned back, placing his head next to john's on the cushion. "don't get me wrong, he's nice. he took me to a club and we had drinks. he just...."  
freddie couldn't find the words and it took him a few moments to sum up what he wanted to say.  
".. i just can't imagine a whole lifetime with him, you know? he's shit at conversation and we have nothing in common." 

john gave yet another sad smile. it seemed like this was a day full of them.

"but maybe opposites attract?" john offered.

"thats the thing, johnny. he is very much like me. he goes to gay clubs every night, sleeps with a lot of men. he's like me, and that's why we don't attract. that's why me and you attract, because we are opposites and i love love love that."

john almost cried at the last sentence. oh, how he longed to jump into freddie's arms and kiss him all over. two days ago he would have done just that. it was crazy. in just a day, everything had changed. in just a day, it was illegal and punishable to kiss freddie. and this time it wasn't due to the fact that they were two men, but because they now had government enforced soulmates, and anyone who went against the government was almost definitely destined to be banished forever.

everytime freddie called him 'johnny', he felt like he was floating in air. it was so incredibly sweet. at first, john had disliked the little nickname, but he had grown to love it, even more within the last week or so. 

"how was your date with veronica?" freddie finally asked, letting out a sigh. john sucked on the top of his mouth, thinking about how to reply.

"it was good. i took her to this italian place. she's pretty and she's nice. she's funny, too. the only thing is is that she has a vagina." 

freddie squealed with laughter at that, smacking john playfully on his upper arm. john also doubled over in laughter. it was bittersweet: the laughter between two people who so longed to be together but couldn't. the laughter between to best best friends. john loved every second. 

there was also anger behind john's words. he was expected to live a full life with a woman even though he was most definitely a homosexual. he had only ever been with two girls. the first one was in high school, her name was stephanie and she had been his first kiss. she broke up with him because he came to school with a hint of makeup on once, and she hated it.

his second girlfriend was in college. they had been together for a solid year when he met freddie, brian and roger for the first time. he tried to have sex with her once after she had practically begged him, but he couldn't do it. that was around about the time that he found himself getting more of a pull towards boys than girls. he just didn't find girls attractive. sure, there were plenty good looking women, but john didn't want to kiss them or have sex with them. he even nearly hurled at the thought. with men, however, he had imagined kissing plenty. in the past week, he had had plenty of dreams about freddie. some innocent, some not so innocent.

"yesterday i was so sure it was going to be you, especially because of the body electric. i felt no body electric with ronnie. did you?"  
freddie shook his head in response.

before john could stop himself, he blurted out the words 'can i kiss you?'  
freddie just looked into the younger boys eyes.  
"as a goodbye?"  
"goodbye? bloody hell john, i'm not leaving the country," freddie tried to lighten the mood.

"n-no i know, i just... a goodbye to this. to us." 

freddie didn't know what to say. he knew it was wrong. the image of john being sent to prison and put to death flashed across his mind. he couldn't put him in that situation. never ever ever. ever.  
the singer shook his head but took john's hands in his.  
"john, darling, it's way too risky. i want to kiss you so so bad but we can't. not now, not ever again."

a tear rolled down john's soft cheek and freddie wiped it away with the pad of his thumb as the bassist nodded in understanding, averting his eyes towards his lap. he knew they weren't allowed to kiss anymore. it was wrong of him to ask. he was just so desperate for contact. anything.

"can we hug then? please, freddie." 

freddie grinned warmly at the young boy, taking him in his arms like his life depended on it. neither of them knew how long they stayed like that but they did know that they would rather die than let go. freddje gave john a sense of warmth and comfort and john never wanted to let that go. john wrapped his arms tighter around freddie. at one point he was almost certain that he was squeezing him a little too tight, but as he went to loosen his arms a little to let freddie breathe, the singer just wrapped his arms around the younger boy, almost like he was frightened to let go.

they were both frightened. terribly. they didn't know what life would bring them. happiness with their chosen soulmates or a life full of misery with them? they had no clue, but they didn't want to think on that right now. all they wanted to focus on at the moment was how good it felt to be in each others arms

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOW. jesus my hands KILL from that long ass chapter.  
> what an emotional rollercoaster, am i right?! i do apologise for the little angst, but hey, it was also merged with love and a little tiny splash of happiness so i hope ya'll can forgive me. also, every good story needs a little taste of angst to make the storyline interesting, right? just as long there's no major character deaths or something because i cannot handle those bloody hell.
> 
> anyways, before i ramble on and on, i just want to say that i hope you enjoy this chapter! i was so excited to write it and i think it came out well? i dont know, leave me your thoughts! 
> 
> all my looooveee,  
> abs xx
> 
> side note: this story is available on wattpad too! same title, obviously, by '  
> greatpretcnder' :)) 
> 
> ✨not proofread cause im lazy oopsie daisies✨


	4. chapter four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DISCLAIMER - I KNOW THIS IS INCREDIBLY ANNOYING, BUT IVE CHANGED THE STORY UP A LITTLE BIT.   
> • queen are no longer famous. they're just getting started, as you'll see in this chapter  
> •this fic is now set in the early 70s, despite me writing '1979' in the last chapter

one year later

january 2nd

freddie, john, brian and roger were sat patiently in the office of none other than john reid. they were situated on a not particularly lovely brown leather couch, right in front of reid's desk. the business man was sat with his chin in his hands, staring straight at the band. he was pondering something incredibly important. roger was looking up at the ceiling biting the inside of his gum, waiting for the silence within the room to be filled. freddie was tapping his fingers across the arm of the chair, becoming irritated rather quickly. 

"okay," reid started, getting the immediate attention from the band. "here's what i'll do..."

john (reid) picked up a black pen from his pencil pot and placed it in between his teeth. "i'll give you a three album deal with EMI." he offered, not missing the outbreak of smiles between the four men sat in front of him. "but please, for the love of god, do not fuck this up."

february 2nd - present moment

queen was on it's way of becoming a household name. they were hopefully not just going to be a local pub band. queen was going to be less of a hobby and more of a career. this made the boys terribly excited.

since matching day, things had changed drastically within the boys lives. despite being soulmates, brian and roger were still just friends (despite john and freddie having a theory that they were friends with benefits) - they realised that the soulmate system heavily states that you must form a relationship with your soulmate, but they also realised that didn't give them a time limit. 

surprisingly, john got to know ronnie really rather well, and they were now in a happy relationship. ronnie was like a friend to john. she was gentle and kind and caring. incredibly caring. john recalled the day that she donated the whole contents of their kitchen cupboards to the homeless shelter down the road. she was too kind for her own good.

john liked ronnie. he liked sitting down and watching movies with her on the night. he liked going out for dinner with her. he enjoyed giving her anniversary presents, like the colossal sheep teddy he got her on their one year.  
john was convinced that he was mistaken on his sexuality after all? he was with ronnie now, and they worked well together. he told himself that he was straight and the reason as to why he spent ages thinking he was gay was because he was at a very vulnerable place in his life. that must be it.

freddie was also in a relationship with his soulmate, mark. mark seemed like a nice guy. he was always good to freddie. he accompanied the singer to the gay clubs and bars that they went to most nights. although on the outside they didn't physically look like a match, it was what really counted on the inside. mark looked like a big, angry fella, but underneath all that he was a softie really. to brian, roger and john anyways.

the band were all in the studio that they had rented out for a good month recording a track that was to be on the first album. 'my fairy king' was a track written by freddie and it was most peculiar. it had taken a good two days for them to record the song itself with freddie being a perfectionist. they were all dreading the editing process since freddie wanted it to be magical and extraordinary and extravagant. freddie wanted everything to be magical, extraordinary and extravagant because he was.

"higher." freddie told roger, who was stood in the little recording booth going over his dog whistle sounding falsettos. john swore that at some points, roger went so incredibly high that john physically couldn't hear him. like his voice was too pitched that the human ear could not hear it. john's throat hurt just at the thought of hitting those notes.

and so, on freddie's command, roger repeated the scream once more, going as high as he possibly could. by the end of it his face was as red as a cherry and he rushed off to get a drink of water.   
"higher"  
"jesus fuck, fred. if i go any higher my voicebox is going to fall out of my throat," roger complained, his speech affected by his sore throat.  
"fred, enough. that's as high as we need it. it's perfectly fine." brian defended the drummer, earning him a smile from roger. brian stuck his tongue out in response.

freddie sat in his chair, rocking back and forth until he finally nodded. "yes, okay then. yes, that's fine. i'm so sorry roger darling," the singer cooed. "here, have a strepsil". roger popped the sweet into his mouth without hesitation, feeling the heavenly confectionary sooth his throat.

john went over to help freddie fiddle with some of the buttons to determine which effect sounded better on roger's voice.   
"john darling, do you like it better like this-" freddie pressed a button which overlapped his own voice with roger's falsetto, which sounded heavenly to the bassist. "-or this?" he pressed another button which just played rogers voice on its own and then afterwards freddie's singing chimed in.  
"definitely the first one." john smiled, pressing the button for the singer. freddie nodded, agreeing with him.  
"yes, you're right. rog's voice always sounds better with mine overlapping it," he winked.

suddenly, the studio door opened, letting a draught in aswell as john's partner, veronica.

john stepped away from the sound board, heading over to the woman who was dressed in a green coat reaching down to her knees.   
"ronnie? what are you doing here?" he wondered, stopping in front of his girlfriend who was smiling at him brightly.

"nothing is wrong, don't worry. i just came to say that i've booked a table at capriccios for 5pm. don't be late, johnny." she winked, kissing him on the cheek.   
when ronnie started calling him johnny, an immense rage flowed through his body because freddie was the only one who called him johnny, roger and brian on occasion. but he forced himself to like the nickname falling from ronnie's mouth.

stepping away from him, ronnie went over to greet roger, brian and freddie. they all liked her, even freddie. it was impossible not to like her. she was like a ray of sunshine, always radiating kindness.   
"hey boys, how are we?" she chirped, placing her hands on rogers shoulders, who was now sat on his leather desk chair sipping water. john didn't the miss the slight look brian gave ronnie and he chuckled to himself quietly.

"good, apart from the fact that my lungs feel as if they're going to freaking explode." roger complained, eyeing freddie, who was still fiddling with buttons and leavers. 

"oh suck it up darling, i could have made you do ten more, but did i? no." the singer smirked, not making eye contact with the blonde due to focusing all his attention on the table below him.

"you only stopped because bri told you off. you're scared of him," the drummer theorised with a cheeky glint in his eye.  
freddie let out a loud howl.

"im scared of bri? that giraffe? no way, honey."   
"hey!" brian spoke up, putting his hands on his hips.

john and veronica were just watching the commotion before them, eyes wide but with smiles on their faces. 

before john knew it, ronnie was walking back up to him, pecking him on the lips and telling him she has to get back to work. john nodded and wished her a goodbye, flopping down on the sofa at the back of the room.

the four of them got back to working on the track straight away. it was a real pain in the ass. freddie was being as annoying as ever, but he always was in the studio; the curse of being a perfectionist.

after hours of work, it it had reached 4:30pm. due to the fact that they had all been singing their hearts out all afternoon, they were full of adrenaline and not particularly tired.  
"lets go to a club," freddie proposed. roger eagerly nodded, already off to grab his coat.

"which one?" john wondered, about to set off to get his own coat. freddie shrugged. "whichever one you like darling."  
"gay?"   
freddie nodded.  
"fantastic"

♛

the music was blaring as the four of them entered the club. it was surprising that there was this many people partying at half past five, but the more the merrier.

freddie took everyone's drink orders and skipped to the bar. john noticed he started to flirt with the bartender, fluttering his eyelashes and leaning in just a little too close. john knew freddie wasn't the type to go around sleeping with other guys so he chose not to worry. besides, a little flirting never hurt anybody. heck, john found himself flirting with other people at clubs. freddie was happy and content with mark. they had a good relationship; an understanding relationship.

john sets his eyes on the dance floor, losing himself in the vibrant colours and the vibrations from the music. he witnessed all the sweaty bodies clinging onto each other as they danced their hearts out and john couldn't wait to be one of them as the night progressed. he'd always loved dancing; loved the fact that, when on the dance floor, you were surrounded with people you had most likely never met on person terms before and so nobody could judge you on who you were as a person. they judged you on your dance skills and john had to admit that he had some crazy moves up his sleeve.

the club was just a ray of colour, like a william henrits painting. splashes of blues, yellows, pinks. colours mixed with raving silhouettes. on the dance floor, people were just able to be completely themselves. the lights blared and flickered, creating a more pumped up atmosphere.

and then, along came freddie, interrupting his thoughts whilst carrying a tray of four drinks and four shots. brian spluttered at the sight of the alcoholic beverages.  
"bloody hell, fred. planning on getting shit faced?"   
"you know it, darling. i've been under too much stress lately, i need to cut loose," freddie replied, picking up his drink which john assumed was a gin and tonic of some kind. maybe vodka and tonic.

john leaned over and took his own drink, cradling it between his two hands when he settled it on the table. it was just a glass of vodka and coke, a beverage john had come to like within the last couple weeks, thanks to veroncia. she had introduced it to him once on a date night, and after john had cruelly teased her for not having straight up vodka, he had his own sip which later resulted in him ordered himself three glasses of the drink and apologising profusely. ronnie just looked on with a smug smirk on her face.

brian and roger had huddled their chairs closer together and were obviously holding hands under the table even though they most likely thought john and freddie wouldn't have been able to tell. why were they holding hands under the table anyways? they were in a gay club.

"guys, we're in a gay club. you can hold hands above the table, you know?" john told them, raising an eyebrow in confusion. the blonde just smiled at brian before lifting their hands up and resting them on the wooden furniture. john smiled at the sight.

"why don't you two just get together already?" freddie piped up, taking a sip of his drink whilst still keeping heavy eye contact with the two across the table. "you've shagged, haven't you?"

brian and john both coughed at that in unison but roger just stayed seated, keeping his blue eyes on his best friend.

"we haven't talked about it yet. for now we're just friends."  
"with benefits?"  
brian and roger didn't deny it.

john took another gulp of his vodka and coke, feeling the burn of the vodka down his oesophagus being put out almost immediately by the sweetness of the coke. it was a heavenly remedy, one he was very glad he was introduced to. 

after his third glass, he starts to feel the effects of the vodka, his vision becoming ever so slightly blurry and his head feeling woozy. but the wooziness was overpowered by the complete adrenaline rush which contributed to john's complete and utter desperation to join in on the dance floor. 

"im gonna go dance!" the bassist shouted over the funky music to his friends to which they all smiled and nodded. freddie told him that he'd be up in five minutes give or take but insisted that he didn't need to wait for him. and so he didn't, and john almost skipped to the centre of the room, shoving himself into the abundance of sticky skin and grinding torsos. 

john never really danced with one specific person during his nights out. he belonged to everyone in the room, and as soon as he started to get lost in the music and rush, he would happily grind against anyone who would come up to him. he of course preferred to grind up against men and feel their hardening groins, but john would never admit that to himself. he was too far gone with ronnie. and ronnie was a woman.

john raised his arms and entangled them with everyone elses. he moved his body in time with the rhythm of the music and he jutted his hips along with the beats. he was far too close with strangers but he certainly did not care. he very much enjoyed the company of total randomers in the club. he had met many peculiar individuals on his nights out and he found that everyone needs to rely on the kindness of strangers. 

john didn't know any of the songs that were being played but that didn't matter. as long as he had a beat to grind to and a person to grind on, he couldn't complain. 

he knew he was drunk as he had had way more than three vodka's and cokes but he didn't want to admit it. he wasn't completely pissed up but he wasn't just tipsy either. 

"well hello darling!" an all too familiar voice shouted at him from behind, the body which he had just been rubbing his ass up and down on for the past five minutes. it didn't surprise him that he hadn't looked behind him once he started moving up and down the man's body, because he never usually did, but he was now heavily regretting that decision.

he spun around as quick as lightening before a hot flush appeared on his face. he reminded himself to fucking thank the lord that the room was dark and so freddie couldn't see his blushing, but he had a feeling that the singer knew of his state anyways. 

freddie's face was being lit up momentarily by the fluorescent, flashing club lights which were pulsing to the beat of the music. they helped define freddie's unusual yet breathtaking features and for a little tiny moment, shorter than a millisecond, john could see why his past self was so close to falling in love with him.

"f-freddie what are you doing here?" he retorted, forcing himself out of his forbidden thoughts.   
"what, i'm not allowed to dance now?" the singer replied, a glint in his eye. john rolled his own eyes, turning back around to continue his grooving.

"hey, hey.. dance with me." freddie cried out as soon as the bassist had placed his focus on others around him, ignoring the raven haired man who was still bopping to the music behind him.

john let out a sigh and slowly turned around to face himself with the singer once again.   
"you know that's not a good idea." he said with a sad undertone.

"oh don't be so dramatic, darling. just dance, cmon. we're friends, aren't we?" freddie questioned, gradually beginning to bop harder along to the music, which seemed to be getting louder to the bassist (or maybe that was just the effect of the alcohol).

john nodded. "of course we are." he whispered, and he was surprised that freddie had caught what he'd said. and so they danced together, john trying his absolute hardest to keep a relatively far distance between the both of them. however, it was quite hard when freddie was moving closer to him with each pop of the hip and spin.

john knew that they were in a club full of people who could easily report any suspicious behaviour, and considering how close freddie and john were standing and also considering the fact that they were not soulmates just made the chances of being reported even greater. but they couldn't find it in them to care.

they weren't going to get too worked up anyways. they were just two best friends dancing together. they weren't technically doing anything wrong. john knew that the past him would be absolutely going crazy right now. he'd have a hard on for sure. the bassist laughed and shook his head at the absurd thought.

"what's so funny?" freddie beamed at him. freddie was sweaty at this point. he had already been an incredibly sweaty individual, to the point where when he was performing, he'd create such a humid environment that his hair would poof out and he'd look like a cloud... poofier than brian's hair!

"oh nothing, just thinking." john waved his hand, hoping freddie would drop the conversation. however, it didn't look like luck was on his side.

"oh yeah? what about?" the singer raised an eyebrow and a smirk gradually appeared on his wet face.   
"the fact that a year ago i'd totally have a hard on with you dancing this close to me."

it seemed john didn't really have a filter when he was intoxicated. he was rather honest, too.

freddie nearly choked and john broke out in laughter at the sight. he was beginning to wobble on his feet at this point, concluding that he'd probably need assistance for walking anytime soon.

"and how come you haven't got a hard on now, dear?" the singer slowly asked, treading ever so lightly. this time john nearly choked.

"b-because you're with mark and i'm with ronnie. you love mark." john thought he was stating the obvious.

"oh don't be so ridiculous, i don't love mark. he's a good person, don't get me wrong. treats me so gentle and with so much kindness, but i could never love him." 

john didn't know how to feel. angry? because of the fact that freddie had totally taken this soulmate thing for granted. no. upset? because of the fact that freddie hadn't found love within his match, and john knew that freddie deserved love and happiness more than anybody else. yes.

but, john didn't let himself show his soft side.

"you don't love him?! freddie! why? didn't you even try?" the bassist tried to speak with as much anger as he could muster, but he naturally wasn't a harsh person, so he figured he sounded less angry and more sympathetic.

the older man looked down at the floor. he was still bopping but his movements had drastically slowed down. the lights were still flashing, casting upon his face like sunlight through the trees.

"i did try, johnny. i did. i lied to myself for so many months but i can't be arsed with that bullshit anymore."

the bassist knew where he was coming from. at the start, he had lied to himself for months too, constantly telling himself that he was over freddie and totally head over heels for veronica. it had now come to the point where he had told himself this for so long that he was only just starting to actually believe it. veronica was good for him. he loved veronica. he did.

john had a humongous urge to just hug freddie tightly and most likely never let go, but he didn't. he knew that would just open up a gate that he had shut one whole year ago and promised himself that he would never open again. he'd given veronica the key to that gate and he had no intention whatsoever in unlocking it. 

veronica was good for him. he loved veronica.   
veronica was good for him. he loved veronica.  
veronica was good for him. he loved veronica.

"you need to try harder, freddie. you and mark weren't matched for no reason. do something about it." john said, making his way off the dancefloor and heading to brian and roger.

the two men were currently playing tonsil hockey, and john just laughed at the sight. it made him wonder just how long they were going to keep avoiding a proper relationship and how much longer they were going to stay in denial. you see, brian and roger loved eachother. they loved eachother dearly. as best friends and lovers. they had just never admitted the lovers part.

roger had his fingers grasping brian's curly locks, pulling slightly which brian seemed to be enjoying alot.   
"hey, get a room i beg of you!" john cried out as he took his place at the table once again. he eyed his drink, but knowing that it had been left for more than twenty minutes and taking into account that brian and roger had probably been snogging for those twenty minutes, john concluded that anyone could have slipped something into his beverage, so he didn't dare take another sip. safety first.

the blonde gave john the middle finger and refused to let go of brian, still sucking the life out of his face. to be fair to the drummer, brian seemed to be enjoying it alot and also sucking roger's face, so he was to blame too. john knew it was useless and he decided to just leave them be.

he drifted his gaze towards the dance floor again, his eyes settling on a certain man, who was now grinding up a different man. john had no idea about his situation with mark. didn't freddie know he was putting them both at serious risk? he wasn't aware of mark's side of the story, but he could easily guess that he was in love with freddie. who didn't love freddie? john would have easily fallen in love with freddie if he was given more time. if he was being completely honest, he was still in love with freddie, but he knew better than to act on it.

freddie wasn't just someone you got over. even his one night stands had thought about him for days on end until they finally had to force themselves to get over their little crush, knowing that they'd most likely never meet the wonderful persian man again. he had a face which stuck in your mind for the rest of your life. nobody could easily forget freddie. he was a lingering presence in your mind, and most people were totally okay with that. who wouldn't be happy to have freddie's face in their heads from days to months to years?

deep down, john felt sorry for mark. but as he said before, he didn't have his side of the story. for all he knew, both freddie and mark could be sleeping with a different guy every night because they were unable to feel love towards eachother.   
they both seemed like rule breakers. 

although the government strictly prohibited adultery and not forming relationships with your soulmates, they didn't exactly keep close tabs on people. it was up to society to report anything suspicious that went on. john knew that many soulmates had committed adultery in the past. it wasn't uncommon, actually. the soulmate system could control their lives physically, but certainly not emotionally. you couldn't help who you loved and who you didn't love. it was a fact of life.

john was just glad that he was matched with veronica. 

veronica.

john had totally totally forgot. he started to panic immediately. he whipped up his arm to see his wrist watch.  
7:34pm

shit shit shit shit.

"sorry guys, i gotta bolt. i totally forgot about dinner with ronnie." john told brian and roger, shooting up out of his chair to wrap himself up in his coat which was hanging on the back of his seat.   
roger and brian parted.  
"shit, john. wasn't that at 5?" roger started to laugh which wasn't helping john's situation or mood at all.

"yeah, it was. shit. i'm the worst ever. i'll see you guys tomorrow at the studio. tell freddie i had to leave early." john rushed out his words, checking he had everything with him. phone? check. wallet? check. house keys? check. 

"will do. good luck mate." brian waved his rushing friend off before pressing his lips up against rogers once again.

as john was heading towards the exit, someone stopped him in his way.   
"john, darling, where are you off to so soon?" freddie slurred whilst leaning his back on the chest of an equally drunk man who had a wobbly smile. john made eye contact with the considerably larger man before darting his eyes back to his friend, glaring. how is he going to just shag this bloke without an ounce of regret?

"back home. totally forgot i had dinner plans with ronnie," he told him, not really bothering to go into detail knowing freddie most likely wasn't even listening to a word he was saying. he shook away that thought. sure, freddie was drunk and was going to shag a complete stranger with a soulmate waiting up at home for him, but he wasn't a bad or careless person.

but, the fact that he was off to shag a complete stranger with a soulmate waiting up at home for him didn't look too good on his part.

"oh dear, lovie. well, have fun!" he shouted a little too loud before rushing past john and dragging the mystery man to the bathroom. john tutted and rolled his eyes before turning back towards the exit, not sparing a moment before dashing out the door, the blaring club music becoming more distant the further he walked.

♛

john stuck the keys in the lock and twisted, the door opening immediately. he quietly walked in and took off his coat, hanging it up on the coat hanger. him and veronica didn't live together but john found himself spending the night at ronnie's for weeks on end. in fact, he stayed there so often that she'd given him keys to the place not that long ago.

"ronnie? baby, you up?" he called into the apartment, hoping that she was still awake. he needed a chance to explain himself and he couldn't do that whilst she was asleep.

"in here." a quiet little voice replied, coming from the living room. john darted in their straight away and frowned at the sight of his soulmate huddled up with their bed duvet on the sofa, comfort eating. she had a box of chocolates on her lap and a bowl of mint choc chip ice cream settled on her knee.

john rushed over to the sofa and took a seat next to ronnie. he made her look at him by placing his fingertips underneath her chin and turning her head so she could look him in the eyes.

"ronnie i'm so so so sorry. i can't even put into words how bad i feel. please forgive me, love. it'll never happen again, i promise."

"where were you?"

"i was with the boys at a bar. we went to get a couple drinks to celebrate the work we did today in the studio. god, ron, i'm so fucking sorry." he placed his head in her lap and he was ever so surprised when he felt delicate fingertips working through his soft hair.

"hey, it's okay. it's okay, i promise you. i forgive you, johnny. let's go to bed. it's forgotten about. tomorrow's a new day, honey."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 💗not proofread💗  
> i couldn't write ronnie as a mean character because i love irl ronnie so much😭 stan irl veronica tetzlaff!
> 
> i hope you enjoyed this chapter, my loves. next chapter we will have a look into freddie and mark's relationship into more depth and some more exciting stuff will happen so yay :))
> 
> i hope you are enjoying this story, darlings <3
> 
> -abs xoxox


	5. chapter five

"where were you?" mark questioned freddie as the singer walked through the front door. it was easily noticeable that freddie was tipsy, perhaps even fully drunk. mark had his arms crossed, waiting for an answer.

"i was just out with the boys, love" freddie replied, his mouth feeling sour at the word 'love'.

mark nodded his head slowly but his eyebrow was still raised. "that still doesn't answer my question, love. where were you?" 

freddie hated when mark got like this. controlling and angry. he despised it when he treated him like a child who couldn't control or look after himself. freddie had gotten used to it, however. this was just how mark was and he was going to have to get used to it.

"why does that matter? it wasn't like i was fucking them. why do you always treat me like a petulant child?" the singer raised his voice a little, throwing his coat down on the arm of sofa.

mark just kept his eyes on freddie's face. he could easily tell when he was lying. a perk of being soulmates.

"you fucked someone though, didn't you?" - mark chose not to raise his voice this time. if he did, freddie would just keep denying it.

"oh don't be so ridiculous, mark." the singer retaliated, his words slurring. 

"i can tell when you're lying, freddie. who was it?" 

"i don't know! let's just go to bed, dear." - freddie was too hazy and too unbothered to deal with this right now.

"freddie you do fucking realise what could happen to you if anyone found out about your little shag fests?!" mark did shout this time. although the pair definitely weren't right for eachother, they still cared somewhat for eachother's well-being.

freddie kept silent, walking to their shared bedroom. they didn't live together officially, but freddie spent most nights at mark's with the hope that one day he would fall in love with him and all his worries and stress would be over. it wasn't looking too positive, though.

"yes, mark, i do realise." 

"then why do it, fred?"

freddie just shrugged and turned around slowly to face the other man. before he could stop himself, he collapsed against mark, taking him in his arms. 

"im so sorry, mark. i really am. it won't happen again."  
mark rubbed his back up and down.  
"i know it won't. i'll make sure of it." he replied. freddie couldn't help but detect a menacing and slightly scary tone.

the thing was with mark and freddie was that they could have good days and bad days.. at the start of their relationship, all was well. freddie did like mark in more of a platonic way. he wasn't too sure about mark's feelings but he could probably guess that mark like liked freddie. 

on the good days, mark would treat freddie with gentleness and kindness. he would stroke and play with his raven coloured locks and freddie would relax into his arms.. even freddie couldn't deny that he enjoyed the good days. he loved being cared for and looked out for and it reached the point where he didn't care who was looking out for him, just as long as he enjoyed it.

on the bad days, however, it was bad. mark wasn't an alcoholic as such, but he did drink alot, and when mark got drunk and more angry than usual, he liked to take it out on freddie, for reasons the singer couldn't understand. he had only slapped him once and mark had apologised profusely the day after, but freddie would never be able to forgive him properly. nobody fucking hit freddie mercury.   
freddie would be lying if he said he didn't hit mark straight afterwards, though. he was just trying to defend himself. freddie didn't apologise. he didn't have to. mark hurt him first.

it was mostly verbal. mark had called freddie countless names over the past year. and freddie had called him countless names over the year.   
the singer couldn't count how many times he had stormed out of mark's apartment in a rage and headed to his own official home where he lived with brian, roger and john (although john was hardly ever there. he was always at veronica's).

mark and freddie had always crawled back to eachother, however, both of them being too scared to face the consequences of if they broke up. 

there were more good days than bad days, however, so freddie couldn't complain. nobody knew about the bad days. not even brian and roger. whenever freddie had stormed out and went back home, he never really told his best friends why he was so angry and upset. he mostly made up excuses to do with 'stress' or something. sometimes he didn't even answer brian and roger at all when they asked what was up. he was embarrassed that he let someone else take over his life completely. nobody told freddie fucking mercury what to do, and yet mark had figured out a way.

considering the night's events, freddie could predict that the day after would most likely be a bad day. that was the reason why freddie sneaked out from under mark's arm in the middle of the night and went to sleep in the spare room. on bad days, mark liked to wake up and have sex. rough sex. freddie had never been opposed to rough sex in the past, he had actually quite enjoyed it. but the person who he was having said sex with him was never actually angry. mark was, and so freddie found it incredibly hard and painful to walk afterwards. it had been so bad at some occasions that he collapsed in the bathroom and sobbed for hours on end. 

freddie would also never tell anybody about this. he had a huge phobia of embarrassment. and that's exactly what he was. a big humongous embarrassment to his best friends, his family. to himself. to john.

john seemed so happy with veronica, and freddie was ever so happy for him. john deserved a beautiful romance with veronica. ronnie treated him well and that's all freddie could ask for. john treated veronica well, too, and freddie was so proud of him for that. veronica was such a nice and gentle woman. john deserved her and veronica deserved him.  
they were perfect for eachother.

and through all of this, freddie couldn't help but feel jealous. he wanted that big love, the fairytale. he wanted that with john, and then he had wanted that with mark but then he realised that he could never love mark and so he was just stuck.

♛

morning came and freddie had a stiff neck due to the awful cushions that were on the bed in the spare room. he seriously needed to consider buying comfier bedding considering the many nights he spent in there alone.

he groggily got out of bed and ran his hands through his hair. he didn't really want to get up and face mark but he had no other choice.

"you slept in there again? really, freddie?" mark spoke as freddie walked into the kitchen. the singer just nodded without a single word.

"oh are you giving me the silent treatment now? how nice." mark chuckled - but it wasn't funny at all.

the pair were silent as freddie was making a sandwich for breakfast.

"im going back home to see rog and bri," freddie announced. "i should be back later."

mark let out a huff. "this is your home, freddie. you are always here."

"it isn't officially my home. it never will be"

"oh don't be so fucking ridiculous."

freddie was too tired to start an argument and so he took a bite of his sandwich, grabbed his long fur coat and headed out the door.

the singer was surprised to see john sat alongside brian and roger in their flat. john was hardly ever there and so it made freddie wonder the reason behind his presence. did he have an argument with ronnie? was he just visiting? did they have a band practice that he'd forgotten about in the midst of the arguing with mark?

swallowing the last bite of his sandwich, freddie made his way fully into the living room and greeting his friends by waving a hand and nodding, unable to speak due to the food in his mouth. 

"back again fred?" brian started, wondering about the singer's wellbeing. freddie forced a chuckle, not wanting to give away any negative emotion. freddie was the strong one, the one who was supposed to be happy and jolly all the time. at times like these, though, he found it exhausting.

"i am indeed. missed you all," freddie winked playfully, sitting himself down by roger and john, squashed in the middle of them.

"we're flattered, fred." roger joked back, elbowing the singer softly in the sides.

a long silence overcast the four men, neither one of them knowing how to start up another conversation. and so, they all just sat there. john shaking his knee, roger itching the top of his gums with his tongue making a horrible squelching sound and brian itching the top of his head amidst the abundance of rabid curls.

brian, roger and john had a slight suspicion that the reason why freddie made such frequent visits back home was because of problems in mark's home. that's the reason why brian brought it up.

"everything okay at home, fred?" brian softly spoke, knowing this could potentially be a sore spot for the singer. freddie directed his gaze at the guitarist, tilting his head in confusion. 

"of course, darling. we're not arguing, are we?" freddie laughed awkwardly, scanning each of his friends faces to detect any anger across their features.

"i meant at your home. with mark." brian then tilted his own head in confusion, as did roger and john.  
"that isn't my home dear, don't be silly. this is my home, i've lived here and paid rent long enough," freddie shot back, slightly hurt that brian would insinuate that this was no longer his home. that he was no longer welcome here.

another awkward silence draped itself over the room, brian and roger looking at eachother with concerned eyes, john looking down at the floor, refusing to meet any type of eye contact with anyone in the room.

and then suddenly, they all heard the kettle whistle. brian shot up instantly. "rog, wanna come help with the tea?"  
roger nodded with such force that freddie feared for the state of his neck.

"fred? tea?" the blonde asked, looking into freddie's eyes. the singer just returned roger's question with a nod, holding up his pointer finger as if to say 'with one sugar, please'. roger understood the gesture and rushed off into the kitchen with brian, leaving a quiet john and freddie behind.

as soon as the two left, john turned himself towards freddie, taking the singer by surprise.   
"you can be honest with me, you know." john tried to lighten the tension in the room.

"i don't know what you're talking about, dear," freddie replied, locking his eyes on the table in front of them, refusing to meet the bassists longing eyes. 

"i remember what you told me, freddie. last night. at the club. about how you and mark aren't really the best together and such." john treaded softly, not wanting to anger or upset the older man, since it was clear he was a little upset as soon as he walked into the room.

freddie didn't reply for a hot minute until he let out a long, exasperated sigh. john had a feeling that he wanted to let it all out. that he didn't want to hide what was truly going on at mark's. but john also didn't know if anything was going on at mark's, so he didn't really have the right to assume anything and act upon it.

"i don't like it there." freddie's voice was nothing but a delicate whisper, so quiet that john only just about heard the singer's words. john softened his features immediately.

"why not?" the bassist pouted, scooting just a little closer to his friend who was showing his rare vulnerable side all of a sudden.

"it's mark. he was angry last night."  
"about what?" john instantly questioned, still keeping the soft tone.

"about how i was out late last night. he was angry when we went to bed so i slept in the spare room because-" the singer stopped.

john nodded his hear as if to say '..carry on'

freddie looked hesitant and he ponderer wether or not he should tell john. he knew john wouldn't shout at him or do anything like kick freddie out of the apartment. that wasn't in john's nature. he was just scared that john would be embarrassed to be friends with him. because that's what freddie was. a weak, humiliating embarrassment.

"i..." freddie stuttered. john nodded again.  
"go on. you can tell me anything," the bassist smiled, and when john looked at him like that, freddie knew that he couldn't make a fool of himself if he tried. 

and yet, he couldn't find the balls to tell him.

"i don't... i don't really want to talk about it right now.... is that.. okay? im so so sorry" freddie stuttered, looking down in fear and shame. he expected john to stand up, have a go at him and leave. but he did nothing of the sort.

john's facial features relaxed and a look of complete adoration took over. he shook his head, smiling slightly.   
"you don't have to apologise, silly. of course it's okay.. i won't force you to talk about anything you don't want." john spoke quietly.

and then, the bassist did something which completely took the singer by surprise. he opened his arms as if asking to envelope freddie in a bear hug. and who was freddie to refuse? he flung himself into john's awaiting arms, snuggling his face into his neck. 

freddie scooted even closer to john without letting go and wrapped his arms around the younger man's back, gripping his shoulders from behind. i could get used to this, he thought. but i won't be able to get used to it because veronica was the one who was able to hug john intimately whenever she pleased, not me.

pushing his thoughts aside, freddie snuggled even more into john, the scent of his fresh cologne invading his nostrils. he was absolutely drunk on it, and he wanted to smell that cologne on him, on his pillows, in his bed. 

it was at times like these that freddie wondered just why did they let eachother go? the obvious answer was right there in front of them, but why didn't they embark on a hot, sexy affair? they could have, the opportunity was there, but they both knew that in reality, it wasn't plausible. but, that didn't mean that freddie didn't lie awake at night, thinking of john and all the mischief they could have gotten up to if only this fucking soulmate system didn't exist.

even when mark was the one sleeping next to him freddie imagined it was his bassist best friend. mark normally slept with his back to freddie, and so it was easy for the singer to picture long, light brown locks of hair delicately cascading down the mans back and splayed out on the pillows. it was easy to imagine mark turning around to face freddie, but only this time, it was john's face. it was easy to imagine john as the one on top of him, pushing into him with ease instead of mark.

freddie knew that his thoughts were completely forbidden and if anyone except brian and roger found out, he'd be thrown in jail for life or executed. and yet, even with these malicious consequences, freddie couldn't find it in himself to give a shit. john was all freddie wanted. it stung his heart when realisation slapped him across the face, repeating over and over that him and john would never be a 'thing' and it was all in freddie's head. 

he felt bad. not for mark but for veronica... freddie knew john wasn't straight. he was as straight as a fucking round-a-bout. but the bassist had convinced himself a heterosexual for ronnie's sake. it didn't escape freddie's attention yesterday when john reacted to the face that they were heading of to a gay club. he was over the moon!

freddie remembered the day when john came home crying because he had tried to have sex with a girl to try and 'escape the impure feelings he had towards men' and all he did was kiss the girl, make it to her bedroom and curl up into a ball and sob. the girl, however, had been incredibly supportive and had even offered to accompany john back home in a taxi.

'i couldn't do it,' said john, in freddie's arms, tears soaking through the older man's white silk shirt. 'i got to her room and just curled up. literally. and i sobbed for a good twenty minutes.'

freddie's heart literally broke in two.   
'i get it, darling, i do. when i was your age i was in the midst of having sex and i just broke down in tears, very much still inside the girl.' freddie joked about the moment that happened years ago, but it really wasn't funny. freddie was at an incredibly vulnerable stage of his life at that time and that night pretty much shaped the person he was today, even if it was traumatising.

the singer squeezed onto his best friend as tight as possible, the thought of letting go physically hurting him.

they stayed like that for a good two hours. by the end of the first hour their fingers were interlocked and by the end of the second hour john was sat in freddie's lap, leaning back against his chest, arms wrapped around his torso and fingers still clutching tight onto one another.

since that day, freddie had only ever seen john with men. not one single woman had freddie seen john bring back to the flat or leave a club with. they were always men, and so freddie almost screamed when it was announced that john's soulmate was a woman. it just didn't make sense.

the day after matching day, freddie knew that john had called up someone basically questioning as to why he was matched with a woman. he was a man who also happened to be a raging gay. the person over the phone had apparently informed john that it was impossible for there to have been a mix up and that john perhaps wasn't gay after all. this really knocked john up, sending him into a spiral for days on end.

freddie guessed that john had decided to try and talk himself into being straight after seeing him locking his lips onto ronnie's. 

and with all of this, freddie was still oblivious. oblivious to the fact that john also laid awake at night silently wishing that freddie was the one who's head was resting upon his chest and wishing that freddie was the one who had given him a killer blowjob not even an hour beforehand.

come to think of it, both men were clueless to the fact that even though it was one whole year ago, they wouldn't ever be able to get rid of the nagging inside their minds. the nagging that seemed to say 'suck it up you dickheads! you're made for eachother. lose control completely. love him, cherish him, treasure him. keep him. sleep with him. marry him. you'll regret it if you dont. you'll never meet another man like him in your life ever again.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope you enjoyed this chapter!! again, it is not proofread hehe sorry darlings 💖   
> im sorry that there has been no actual deacury action just yet, but there shouldn't be too long to wait! i should tell you that i am literally just winging this story at this point and considering that im very forgetful and i forget what's happening most of the time, i do try to make it all make sense heehhe...
> 
> again, i hope you enjoyed! leave your thoughts, wether their nice or nasty! every comment is appreciated sweethearts<3
> 
> \- abs xox

**Author's Note:**

> hello! here is my second fanfiction on ao3! and its deacury this time instead of jimercury oooooo (controversial)  
> i really hope you enjoy. this fic is also posted on my wattpad so yay.  
> pls be kind and leave kudos i beg, and if you're feeling particularly cheeky, perhaps leave a comment? :,)  
> -abs xx


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